You've taken on a challenging task. It's difficult enough to be
dealing with a troubled relationship. The burden of finding competent
and accessible help can sometimes seem overwhelming on top of all the
other problems. The people you're trying to assist are fortunate to
have someone like you helping them. I'll try to provide you with a
fair variety of options in addition to the information on Imago
Therapy that madamlibrarian-ga has already give you.
First of all, I'd like to recommend a method which is fairly unusual
in that it doesn't approach marital problems from the usual "conflict
resolution" standpoint, but instead directly addresses the
difficulties you stated in your question. That is, this approach aims
to teach couples exactly how to meet each other's differing needs
(emotional, sexual and other) while avoiding behaviors harmful to the
relationship, in an attempt to restore and maintain the initial "in
love" feeling that brought them together in the first place.
Dr. William Harley, who pioneered this concept, does have a great
reputation. In fact, he's had quite startling and widespread success
with this approach, which he calls "Marriage Builders." The main
Marriage Builders website is here: http://www.marriagebuilders.com
I'd recommend you (or this couple) do a fair amount of reading on the
basic concepts to see just how this differs from so many of the more
usual approaches to marriage counseling. I can personally attest to
the efficacy of this method and approach, my partner and I having used
it ourselves, although without going through a formal counseling
process. There is a mailing list and a discussion forum, where you
can find out more about how others use and benefit from this method.
I do realize that the Marriage Builders counseling center is located
in Minnesota, not Virginia. However, it has had enormous success with
telephone counseling, which it has found equally effective as the
face-to-face counseling previously used. The rationale is explained
here: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7200_phone.html and
if you think this might be something that could help the couple you
are assisting, there is more information on using the service here:
http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7000_counsel.html
However, if you (or they) would really prefer using a more traditional
approach in the immediate Alexandria area, here are several choices:
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The Virginia Association for Marriage and Family Therapy's main
website is here: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi7000_counsel.html
They provide contact information for counselors trained in a
particular technique, which is one of five core disciplines recognized
by the National Institutes of Health, and is recognized by the U.S.
Public Health Service's Health Resources Services Administration as a
core mental health profession (along with psychiatrists, clinical
psychologists, clinical social workers, psychiatric nurse specialists,
and counselors). (42 CFR Part 5) You can read about this approach
here: http://www.vamft.org/mft.html
For locating a MFT therapist in a particular area, you can use their
"Therapist Locator" service here: http://www.therapistlocator.net/
Here's the search result for counselors within a 15-mile radius of
downtown Alexandria:
http://www.aamft.org/cgi-shl/TWServer.exe/Run:LOCATEUS_4
In addition, Virginia Tech offers a sliding scale clinic as an adjunct
to their educational program in this particular method. You can find
more information about that service here:
http://www.nvgc.vt.edu/mft/cfs.html
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Marriage Encounter is, of course, sponsored by the Catholic Church,
yet many non-Catholics have availed themselves of the service it
provides in enriching and helping marriages, and it has an excellent
reputation. As it says on their website, "The Marriage Encounter
Weekend is Catholic in orientation and is expressed in the tradition
and understanding of the Catholic Church. [But] It is presented in a
way that married couples from all faiths have come away from the
Weekend experience strengthened in their own religious beliefs." If a
spiritual approach is something that would be important to this
couple, they may want to look into this further. Information on
Marriage Encounter for Northern Virginia is here (be prepared - it
plays music automatically): http://www.erols.com/monje/wwme.htm
Directly related to this is the church's program for troubled
marriages, called "Retrouvaille," http://www.retrouvaille.org/
Retrouvaille is "a program for couples in troubled marriages,
separated individuals, and those who want their previous marriage to
work again," and like Marriage Encounter, is taught under the auspices
of the Catholic Church, but is not limited to Catholics only. "The
word Retrouvaille, simply means 'rediscovery'. The program offers the
chance to rediscover yourself, your spouse, and a loving relationship
in your marriage." There are several weekends scheduled for 2003 in
Virginia locations. The schedule is here:
http://www.retrouvaille.org/weekends/weekends%20schedule_1.html
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An alternative, very non-traditional approach to marriage and
relationship issues, including hypnotherapy and other unconventional
techniques is offered by Access Wisdom, which is located in Northern
Virginia. Their main website is here: http://www.accesswisdom.com
They do give information about their educational background and
training, as well as their services, but unfortunately do not provide
any testimonials or other references as to the efficacy of their
approach. I've provided their info merely as one more alternative.
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And finally, here is a place where you can request a referral and
quote from/by a marriage counselor based on your selected criteria,
such as certification, gender, budget, and any other considerations
you consider important:
http://www.respond.com/buyers/requestform.jsp?noproxy=1&path=1800000005&path=1604023310&cat=1720000056&src=4419251
Another, similar site is here:
://www.google.com/url?q=http://www.4therapy.com/locator/index.php&sa=l&ai=AV2aQxem490rsqcrglUpqBkss-UpvZKA3THYBCsAkOBA8TmgAIMA&num=11
And the National Board for Certified Counselors offers a referral
service here: http://www.nbcc.org/ The search results for Alexandria
are here: http://www.nbcc.org/cfind/CounselorFindPractice.asp
I hope this information fulfills your request for several choices of
reputable marriage counselors. If anything isn't clear, or if I have
misunderstood your needs, please allow me to clarify before rating the
answer. I am really interested in helping you, and the couple you are
assisting, find help for this all-too-painful, but hopefully solvable
problem.
Best regards,
Byrd |
