I have found out lately that my brother is a homosexual and I want to
help him to become a normal person.

how can I help him to become a normal male rather than a Homosexual?
where can I find a psychologist or physicians that I could consult 
over the net to help with this problem?
Where else can I find help?
Is male homosexuality a physical problem or psychological problem?

Please answer by showing solutions and not by telling me that there is
nothing wrong of him being a homosexual.

Some info about him:
he is 27 years , married and father of a 3 years old boy.
- He is willing to seek help and become a normal person.
- He was abused sexually when he was a chilled.
- He lives in the Medal East.
- What I know so far that he is the receiving party (others practice
sex on him) I am not sure if he dose it back to them.

P.S.  I am posting this question more than once to get help from more
than one person.

---

Request for Question Clarification by tutuzdad-ga on 05 Jan 2003 09:37 PST

Dear redosam-ga;

If possible, I'd like to suggest that you rethink your question and
perhaps rephrase it in a more neutral manner. You see, researchers are
objective, unbiased and impartial harvesters of factual information.
Their own beliefs rarely play a part in the answers they provide. You
are undoubtedly seeking truth along with your need for a solution and
by insisting that homosexualtity is a "problem" many researchers may
avoidn your question in an effort to avoid what appears to be
inevtible conflict with your stated opinion.

Some professionals (as well as non-professionals) view homosexuality
as neither psychological nor physical nor a "problem". This is fact.
Your insistence that this preference or lifestyle is one or more of
these makes it virtually impossible for an open minded researcher to
find any data supporting any information to the contrary.

A willingness on your part to accept an answer that might not be
agreeable to your personal beliefs will open your question to quality
research. The manner in which your question is currently asked
however, seeks to solicit information from only those sources who
share your belief, which you appear to have already established and
anwered on your own.

Regards;
tutuzdad-ga

Greetings Redosam.  I located a few articles for your perusal that
were not present in the answers to your other postings of this
question.  I believe that you are chosing wisely to make yourself
aware of all the information possible on this issue.

"Can Gays Go Straight and Change Their Sexual Orientation? A
controversial US study suggests that gay people can become
heterosexual if they really want to" by Maggie Gallagher
http://www.skfriends.com/can-gays-go-straight.htm

Bem's Theory of Sexual Orientation: Implications for Treatment and
Prevention by Uriel Meshoulam, Ph.D. Cambridge, MA
http://www.leaderu.com/orgs/narth/bem.html

Sexuality & Gender And Mental Health & Illness by Dr. Kevin Franklin,
representing a method called RightSight
http://www.cygnus.uwa.edu.au/~kevfrank/

The Origin & Nature of Being Gay by Dr. Kevin Franklin
http://www.cygnus.uwa.edu.au/~kevfrank/causepartone.htm


The American Psychological Association (APA): 

"Answers to Your Questions About Sexual Orientation and Homosexuality"
http://www.apa.org/pubinfo/answers.html

The list (with links) of 91 other documents relating to homosexuality
at the APA are located at http://search3.apa.org/results.cfm


In the early 1980s when I lived in Manhattan, the actor, William
Atherton, was a guest on a television show where he shared that he was
once gay but that he had undergone a unique counseling that taught
"the celebration of opposites" and that this therapy had enabled him
to become straight.  It was a highly contraversial statement at the
time and I have searched high and low on the Internet for any
reference to this process but I could not locate any links of
information for you on where this counseling takes place or the name
of the process on the web.  My memory only recalls Atherton's comments
and seeming excitement that he had learned to appreciate women as a
straight man.

I do not know, either, if he remained straight.  I searched for
information on how to contact his agent and could not discover an
Internet listing.  However, I have queried in emails to a couple of
agencies and, if they are forthcoming with the information, I will
post his agent's contact information here.  Atherton may be willing to
discuss the therapy but he may also wish not to discuss it.  However,
I am attempting to discover his public contact information for you.


If you need any clarification before rating my answer, please request
it and I will be happy to conduct further research on the matter.


SEARCH PHRASES:

"william atherton" gay
"william atherton" homosexual
"william atherton" homosexuality
"william atherton" actor
"celebration of opposites" gay
"celebrating oppostites" homosexual
"celebrating oppostires" atherton
manhattan counseling become straight
manhattan counseling gay straight
sexual preference therapy
sexual preference theory

---

Clarification of Answer by journalist-ga on 05 Jan 2003 11:21 PST

PS  Regarding mental health professionals that you might access on the
Internet, most licensed professionals are licensed to practice in
certain states only.  If you could share the state where you are
located, I will be happy to search in that area for an Internet or
telephone counseling option.

Thank you very much for your help.

You are very welcome and thank you for your rating and comments.  I
hope my research assisted you with your understanding.

I've been following some of these posts from time to time. They have
opened a whole new world for me. I'm gay and 25. I've been in the
process of change for the last 2 months. Its been awesome. Though not
everyone i've met online have found this easy. Mine has been. so i
will depend on the person. I'm writing this to encourage anyone
dealing with this or who knows someone with Same-sex attraction. 
Change can take place. It is happening to me. I've had a few minor set
backs as any progression requires but for the most part i think I'll
be all right within 6 mos or so if i can find a mentor to help develop
more fully the masculinity i want to possess. unfortunately this is my
fear that since the world is so fearful of homosexuals that it may be
harder finding a heterosexual how is comfortable enough with his own
sexuality not to feel treatened by me. However, there are still ways
that i can achieve my goal.

Please look into other places suggested by i think the second tread on
this subject. try www.peoplecanchange.com, www.narth.com,
www.gaytostraight.com, there are a world of resources and books out
there. My favorite book is Coming Out Straight.  I think the author's
last name is Cohen.

For those who really have a strong desire to change, i hope you find
this information helpful. I also hope that this proves to be as easy a
transistion for you as it has been for me.

I must add that it is very unfortunate that pervious comments on this tread,
Is male homosexuality a physical problem or psychological problem? #2,
has been deleted. That tread was most beneficial to me. Hope some will
take note of these comments and will supply balanced information for
those truly seeking help.

A different perspective.

I am going to not try and put opinion in here, I am simply going to
share my story. Which, may be useful to you.

I grew up in a spirit-filled, southern Christian family. I was loved
as I grew up, not molested, but loved by great people. However, when I
began to mature, I noticed that I looked at the other boys far more
than the girls. I volunteered in my church, I did missionary work, I
was in multiple bible studies. Around the age of 17, I "came out" to
my family. I broke down in tears to my mother and told her my secret.
She cried for many, many hours. But at the end of it, and after
getting lots of advice, she said she wanted to help me heal.

My mother was trying to love me. She wanted only best for me and
wanted me to be able to be happy. Furthermore, I am a very masculine
guy. I like football and have about nothing in common with most
homosexuals. Therefore, the literature and all the ministers in my
life believed it would be relatively easy. I didn't cuss, I was a nice
kid, and I was spirit filled and ready to try anything.

And so, on and off for the next 3 years, I went into *serious* healing
ministry places. I had 5+ people laying hands on me on several
occasions. Went to a Christian therapist for years. I was praying
nightly for God to heal me.

After three years of, honestly, having the purest heart and
intentions, begging my loving God to heal me, it came to me that God
made me this way.

No demons came out of me. Some of the most powerful healers in the
country prayed for me. Yet, silence from heaven.

At 22 now, I'm not sure how to handle all this. What does this mean?

I specifically remember being a 13 year old boy, crying alone on my
bed, literally begging God to heal me. My heart wrenched because I
didn't even have a word for what was wrong with me. I didn't know any
gay people, and didn't even know the concept.

Why would God not listen to a 13 year old boy who loves Him? How could
he not respond? How could he not just take it away?

Why couldn't any of the big name groups heal me? What is wrong with me?

How did I become "perverse" and what do I do after I've done everything?

Now, here is my today. My family AND myself came to terms with it. God
made me gay. As long as I live like a Christian man, that's what's
important. And beyond that, I can't see any other reason why God would
ignore all that.

All I would say is, love your brother. Even if you think its wrong,
that's fine. Just love him. And love him no matter what. Love never
fails. He has been rebuked in his heart for years. If you believe that
God loves His children, then wouldn't He love your brother.

Don't try and be God, just let Him lead in your brothers life. 

I may be wrong. But I dont' feel it. I'm happier and more at peace
with God today than ever. And I thank Him for everything.

If you have any more questions, please email me at hcatlin@gmail.com  

I hope and pray for the best for you and your family.

Sincerely,
HC

www.exodus-international.org

This may be what you're looking for.

FYI- I thought I would add to this thread that homosexuality (male or
female) is neither a physical nor a psychological problem.  Decades of
research have failed to produce evidence that:

- Homosexuality is connected with any sort of psychopathology (the
exception being depressive and adjustment disorders that stem from the
social ostracization of homosexuality).
- Homosexuals are at all dangerous to children or are diminished in
their capacity to parent.

In addition to this, I would also add that there is absolutely no
research whatsoever has established the efficacy of "change" programs.
 These programs tend to be faith-based and unrelated to "mental
health" treatment.  These organizations are truly on the fringes and
are unequivocally repudiated by virtually every major mental health
organization.  Both the American Psychological Association and
American Psychiatric Associations have published position papers that
homosexuality is not pathological.  These organizations have also said
that programs which purport to change individuals from gay to straight
are out of step with scientific thought and responsible mental health
practice.  You should note that decades ago the American Psychological
Association and the American Psychiatric Association removed
homosexuality from the list of recognized psychiatric disorders.

Many people question their sexual orientation.  Many people experiment
with their sexuality, especially in early adulthood.  This is
completely normal.  Indeed, several decades of research on human
sexuality, beginning in the 1950s has established that the discreet
categories of "gay" and "straight" are not nearly so rigid as were
once thought.

Anyone interested in "changing," should be sure to contact a licensed
mental health professional for a second opinion.  See a licensed
psychiatrist or licensed clinical psychologist and discuss with them
the feasability of switching one's sexual orientation.  People
interested in "changing" should understand that "change" programs are
not in any way sanctioned or approved by any reputable mental health
authority.  Most mental health professionals, such as myself, cringe
when these sorts of programs are mentioned.

Conflicts between society (or religion) and sexuality are not
uncommon; there are ways of addressing these issues that do not
involve attempts to convince people that their sexual orientation is
wrong, immoral, or pathological.    Please see a reputable mental
health provider in your area, such as the ones I listed above for more
information.