Dear Sparkie2,
I’m glad you’ve found our services useful in the past. I was unable
to locate any of your other questions, however. Have you been here
previously under another user name?
Your question is certainly a volatile issue to be dealing with. I
hope both families have contacted therapists to help deal with the
stress of such a situation - even the wrongly accused can benefit from
the help and support of a competent therapist, to help ease the burden
of stress while trying to prove one’s innocence. It is important,
too, that the young man in question avail himself of legal counsel
*immediately*.
Obtaining counsel is NOT a tacit admission of guilt. It’s an
important means of protecting one’s rights - especially in the case of
sexual abuse accusations, which are prosecuted very aggressively.
Because the nature of your question is so complex, I’ve broken it down
into smaller parts, to make it more easily understandable. I do feel
compelled to reinforce our standard disclaimer: I am not a lawyer, I
don’t play one on TV, Google Answers or anywhere else, and the
information I provide for you is meant solely as general information.
Let’s start with symptoms exhibited by children who’ve been sexually
abused. Children who have been sexually abused may exhibit a
combination of the following:
-- inability to concentrate
-- drop in grades or skipping school
-- a change in personality (insecurities and needing more reassurance)
-- reluctance to be left alone
-- unexplained "stomach pains" with no identifiable cause
-- sudden mood swings
-- irritability or crankiness
-- reluctance to go to a certain place or be with a certain person
-- sudden change in behavior around a certain person
-- lack of trust
-- sudden loss or increase in appetite
-- sleep disturbances
-- overly compliant behavior
-- aggressive behavior
-- exhibiting sexual knowledge inappropriate for the child's age
-- inappropriate sexual play with peers, toys or themselves
-- regressions like thumb-sucking, bedwetting, or acting like an
infant
-- signs of severe depressions such as withdrawal, sadness,
listlessness and suicidal feelings.
It’s important to note that these symptoms, singularly or in
combination, do not necessarily indicate that a child has definitely
been abused. They *do*, however, indicate a need to learn more about
what the child is feeling and what might have brought these behaviors
on. It’s imperative that a child exhibiting these symptoms be
*immediately* examined, both by his or her regular physician and by a
competent therapist specializing in the treatment of children.
Health and child care providers and law enforcement officials are
legally bound to take each and every allegation of child sexual abuse
very seriously, making it very difficult for those who might be
wrongly accused to defend themselves. In many cases of sexual abuse,
there are *no* physical indications, making the case difficult to
prove either way - a case of one person’s word against another.
Facts About Child Sexual Abuse
http://www.wcstx.com/childabu.htm
Child Sexual Abuse - The American Academy of Child and Adolescent
Psychiatry
http://www.aacap.org/publications/factsfam/sexabuse.htm
Sexual Abuse: Signs of Child Sexual Abuse
http://www.unm.edu/~shc1/sexual-abuse.html
Mental Health Journal - Child Abuse: An Overview - Signs of Sexual
Abuse
http://www.therapistfinder.net/Child-Abuse/Sexual-Abuse-Incest-Statistics.html
Child Sexual Abuse - Signs and Symptoms
http://ds.dial.pipex.com/town/square/gaj28/download/files/kschildabuse.pdf
What signs might an abuser or potential abuser exhibit?
"* Refuses to let a child set any of his or her own limits
* Insists on hugging, touching, kissing, tickling, wrestling with or
holding a child even when the child does not want this affection
* Is overly interested in the sexuality of a particular child or
teen (e.g., talks repeatedly about the child's developing body or
interferes with normal teen dating)
* Manages to get time alone or insists on time alone with a child
with no interruptions
* Spends most of his/her spare time with children and has little
interest in spending time with someone their own age
* Regularly offers to babysit many different children for free or
takes children on overnight outings alone
* Buys children expensive gifts or gives them money for no apparent
reason
* Frequently walks in on children/teens in the bathroom
* Allows children or teens to consistently get away with
inappropriate behaviors"
What To Watch Out For When Adults Are With Children
http://www.stopitnow.com/warnings.html#watchout
"* Talks again and again about the sexual activities of children or
teens?
* Masturbates a lot or takes breaks from other activities to go
masturbate?
* Talks about sexual fantasies with children and is not clear about
what's
okay with children?
* Was abused as a child and won't deal with it?
* Encourages silence and secrets in a child?
* Looks at child pornography?
* Asks adult partners to dress or act like a child or teen during
sexual activity?
* Often has a "special" child friend, maybe a different one from
year to year?
* Spends most spare time on activities involving children or teens,
not adults?
* Makes fun of a child's body parts, calls a child sexual names such
as "stud", "whore", or "slut"?"
Alert Signals For An Adult With Sexual Behavior Problems
http://www.stopitnow.com/warnings.html#alertsignals
As with symptoms of abuse, no single one or combination of these signs
is definitely indicative of an abuser or potential abuser. They are,
however, signs to be alert for, and would indicate a need for the
individual to seek out a qualified mental health professional to learn
why these behaviors are being exhibited and how to stop them.
How does one mask the pain?
Obviously, being accused of child sexual abuse is devastating, both to
the accused individual and to his family. There isn’t really a way to
"mask" the pain, but there are ways to cope.
It’s important for the accused and his family to seek the help of a
competent family therapist. Referrals can be obtained from one’s
regular family physician, as well as the local Academy of Medicine.
How does one prove one’s innocence?
First and foremost, it is essential that the person talk to NO ONE
without their attorney present after being accused of child sexual
abuse. Sign NOTHING unless the attorney has looked it over thoroughly
and cleared it. If the accused is served with legal documents, he
should accept them, make no comment whatsoever, and immediately
contact his attorney.
Do NOT confront the child who has leveled the accusations. Do NOT
confront the family of the child who has leveled the allegations. All
communications should take place through counsel, to protect the
rights of both parties. Additionally, the accused should not offer to
confess or agree to a plea bargain if he is innocent. Doing so will
damage his chances of clearing himself. (i.e. "Why did you confess if
you didn’t do it?")
Get "affidavits of character" from friends, family members, clergy and
co-workers. These can be taken to the clerk of courts and attached to
the case file of the accused. The presiding judge is required by law
to read these affidavits - they cannot be thrown out, and must be
admitted as evidence. This also provides the opportunity for those
close to the accused to "testify", after a fashion, without being
subjected to rigorous cross examination during a trial. The written
statements are admitted as evidence and cannot be discarded.
The accused’s attorney should insist that they child leveling the
accusations be examined by the defense’s psychologist/psychiatrist as
soon as possible, to help determine if the child was abused (or truly
believes he or she was) and to help the accused’s attorney gather
evidence with which to defend his client.
What To Do If You Have Been Falsely Accused
http://www.concentric.net/~vocalmi/what2do.html
What You should Do If You Are Falsely Accused
http://www.falseabuse.com/what.htm
DO's and DON'T's When Falsely Accused Of Sexual Abuse
http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/falseacc.htm
What to do and what not to do when falsely accused of child abuse
http://www.backlash.com/content/gender/1996/4-apr96/vocal04.html
The moment the accused is formally charged, his attorney should file a
"Motion for Discovery". The purpose of this motion is to find out
everything possible about the charges leveled against the accused:
-- who leveled the charges
-- their reasons why
-- the evidence (or lack of same) against the accused
-- investigative notes and reports pertaining to the accused
-- the names of any witnesses who will be called to testify against
the accused
"As an example of what you are entitled to in discovery, consider the
following which should consist of the very least asked for in the
motion:
* The names and last known addresses of persons whom the State
intends to call as witnesses.
* Any written confession, admission or statement of the defendant and
a list of witnesses thereto.
* Whether there was an oral confession, admission or statement made
by the defendant and a list of witnesses thereto.
* The results of any scientific examination conducted upon any
evidence.
* Any material or information within the State's possession or
control which tends to negate the guilt of the accused as to the
offense charge or would tend to reduce his punishment.
* An opportunity to inspect any physical evidence prior to trial."
Pretrial Discovery Issues in False Allegation Cases
http://www.allencowling.com/false05.htm
Links to Assist the Falsely Accused
http://members.aol.com/defendallegation/
Similarly, the prosecution is entitled to know what evidence will be
presented in court, and is likewise entitled to employ tactics such as
full background investigations (including school and financial
records, and a thorough investigation of church and school activities)
How does one select the proper attorney?
Allen Cowling, of Cowling Investigations, Inc, offers the following
advice:
"When attempting to retain an attorney, consider the following
carefully:
*Assure that you retain an expert, or an attorney who will associate
an expert in handling false abuse allegation cases. […]
*Locate an attorney either through recommendation or by contacting
your local Bar Referral Service for a list of attorneys in your area
who are experienced in these matters.
*Do not retain any lawyer without first checking their Curriculum
Vitae (CV) and do not be afraid to question your attorney or his
competence.[…].
*Your attorney must be an effective case manager, able to initiate
appropriate discovery activities, able to identify and preserve the
critical "chain of evidence", and able to manage the available
financial resources effectively.
*Your attorney must be ever-mindful of the importance of the expert
testimony. He or she must be skilled at identifying and using the
appropriate research to organize effective cross-examination and to
present effective and compelling testimony to support the falsely
accused client.
*It is vital that your attorney "convince" a court that it is not
putting a child molester back on the street.
*Your attorney should understand that the side with the best expert
testimony will prevail, regardless of the "truth" or the evidence that
supports it.
[…]
* Your attorney should be fully prepared with defense experts and be
able to effectively cross-examine the State's experts.
* Your attorney should know that when cross-examining an adverse
expert, the only safe question to ask is one that your expert will
answer to your benefit.
*The expert who is able to explain complicated concepts with simple
language will prevail over the expert with an impressive pedigree and
a complicated manner.
*Your attorney should have exact details of who has "interviewed" or
"counseled" a child witness because that is a "chain of evidence" that
can free or shackle the falsely accused.
* If your case does go to trial, make sure your lawyer is very
effective at voir dire (jury questioning).
* Your attorney should attempt to suppress all further therapies with
the alleged child victim. The State will normally have a State
appointed psychologist who will continue interviewing the child prior
to trial to assure that the State's case stays solid. Repeated
interviews by the State's psychologist can be harmful because they can
actually "educate" a child in "firming" up the allegation.
* Your attorney should consider filing motions in limine to stop any
prospective unscientific evidence from being used against you in
court. This simply means that the State appointed psychologist cannot
testify to any expert opinion that is not based strictly on scientific
foundation; ie, Daubert. Their personal opinion should not hold water.
* If your attorney is not able to interview the State appointed
psychologist, or to obtain through subpoena, their notes, records,
reports or copies of the audio/video tapes of their interviews with
the "alleged" victim, conduct a pretrial hearing to determine
specifically what their testimony will be and assure that nothing
reaches the jury in the form of an expert opinion that is not based
strictly on scientific foundation. This is also a good manner to argue
if the psychologist used anatomically "correct" dolls or other
questionable techniques."
Defending False Allegation Cases - Selecting the Proper Attorney
http://www.allencowling.com/false04.htm
Mr. Cowling also offers a list of questions to ask a potential
attorney:
Questioning a Prospective Attorney Defending a False Allegation Case
http://www.allencowling.com/false04A.htm
…and things one should be mindful of when selecting and/or retaining
an attorney:
Attorney Problems we Encounter Defending False Allegation Cases
http://www.allencowling.com/lawprob.htm
There are a number of resources available, assembled by Mr. Cowling,
which explain concerns vis a vis the law, what attorneys and judges
expect, and what juries will concern themselves with. The issue is
very complex, however, and too long to even summarize coherently here.
Instead, I’ve gathered the links for your later perusal and listed
them below:
Motions to Consider In False Allegation Cases (a listing of some of
the motions an attorney may consider when defending one falsely
accused)
http://www.allencowling.com/motions.htm
Basic Laws Specific to False Allegations of Abuse Cases
http://www.allencowling.com/basiclaw.htm
What False Allegation Defense Attorneys Should Know
http://www.allencowling.com/lawknow.htm
With respect to jury concerns:
"Jury voir dire in a false allegation of sexual abuse case is
different than it would be for any other criminal case and certain
issues should be addressed. As an example, a defense attorney may
state, "Ladies and gentlemen, the defendant has been charged with 5
counts of molesting a child:
*Is there anyone here who could not be fair and impartial to the
defendant simply because of the nature of the allegations being made
against him?
*Is there anyone here who believes that since the defendant was
indicted, that he must be guilty?
*Is there anyone here who, simply because these allegations are so
emotional, will not have the ability to weigh all evidence before
reaching a conclusion as to the guilt or innocence of the defendant?
*Is there anyone here who believes that children do not lie?
[…a dozen more questions elided…]
There are a number of other issues to address in addition to the
above, but most attorneys, who have limited or no experience defending
false allegations of abuse, do not realize the power or importance of
proper jury voir dire."
Defending the Falsely Accused at Trial
http://www.allencowling.com/trial.htm
(I would recommend reading the entirety of the noted page, as it deals
with what to expect through all stages of trial proceedings.)
What does the accused do once he’s found innocent?
In order to minimize possible damage to his future professional life,
once he is cleared of all charges, he should petition to have the
records expunged. Procedures vary by state, but his attorney can best
facilitate this for him:
"Central Registries, Expungement of Records
*The term expungement refers to the procedures used by States to
maintain and update their central registries and record-keeping by
removing old or inaccurate records. Under the Child Abuse Prevention
and Treatment Act (CAPTA), in order to receive a Federal grant, states
must submit plans which include provisions and procedures that
facilitate the prompt expungement in unsubstantiated or false cases of
any records that are accessible to the general public, or are used for
purposes of employment or other background checks.
*Under CAPTA, state child protective services agencies may, however,
keep information on unsubstantiated reports in their casework files to
assist in future risk and safety assessment.
*Following an investigation, states classify child abuse records in a
variety of ways, depending on the state's statutory language. Terms
such as "unfounded," "not indicated," "unconfirmed," and
"unsubstantiated" are used to describe situations where there has been
no determination of abuse or neglect. Terms such as "founded,"
"indicated," "suspected," and "substantiated" are given to a report of
abuse or neglect. Several states maintain all investigated reports of
abuse and neglect in their central registries, while other states only
maintain substantiated reports.
[…]
*Due to the nature of the interests that may be adversely affected,
most states authorize procedures whereby an individual may challenge
the validity of a report and, if successful, have the report expunged
or deleted from the registry. Statutes vary as to expungement
standards and procedures. For example, the time specified for the
expungement of unfounded or undetermined reports generally ranges from
immediately upon determination to 10 years. A few states, however, do
not permit unfounded reports to be placed on the registry at all."
Basic Laws Specific to False Allegations of Abuse Cases
http://www.allencowling.com/basiclaw.htm
Last, but certainly not least, how does one offer support to a family
in this situation?
Just BE THERE for them. Whatever you do, do not turn away from them.
Continue to socialize with them, invite them over for dinner or out
for drinks. Continue your contact with them as usual. Ask after
their well-being, and try not to change the subject if they want to
talk about their situation. It’s important to NOT treat the family
awkwardly, even if the subject makes you uncomfortable.
The emotional upheaval when one has been accused of abuse, sexual or
not, is astoundingly difficult to navigate alone. People in the
position of being falsely accused are dealt the double blow of
societal stigma (an immediate pronouncement of guilt by onlookers) and
the daunting task of trying to prove their innocence.
On a personal note, I need to let you know that I’ve answered much of
this from a first hand perspective on both sides of the coin. It’s
been a draining project, but I felt obligated to do it justice for
several reasons. For ten years, until last summer, I was a volunteer
at a local rape crisis center, and worked primarily with the families
of children who had either been molested or had made allegations of
abuse. It is true that sometimes children lie about abuse - such
cases are usually "put to bed" after the child has been thoroughly
examined by a trained child therapist. It is likewise true that some
cases aren’t quite so clear, and it really does come down to "he
said/she said". Children who level allegations of abuse are
immediately reassured that the person they are talking to believes
them and that they are safe - not because the accused is immediately
presumed guilty (though the accused certainly must feel that way!),
but to encourage the child to be forthcoming and tell the truth. As
you’ll note from the pages listed above, all allegations of abuse or
suspicions of abuse are taken very seriously in order to protect the
children who may have been victimized - even if the allegations might
be false.
On the flipside, my husband and I had to deal twice with false
allegations of physical abuse and neglect of our sons. (It was an
angry neighbor with an axe to grind.) Although the social workers who
arrived at our doorstep each time assured us after the initial
interview that it was obvious to them that the complaints were false,
we were still subjected to the utmost scrutiny because the law
requires it - neighbors, teachers and physicians were interviewed, we
were ordered to turn over medical records, and we were vigorously
interviewed several times before being cleared of the allegations.
Social workers even came to investigate the contents of my
refrigerator and pantry! It took several months each time, and we were
grateful for the loving support of our friends and family.
Having first hand knowledge of both sides of the issue, I can
appreciate the level of anguish and stress for all involved.
Please reassure your friend that he’s not alone in his struggle to
prove his innocence, and let him know that law enforcement isn’t "out
to get him" - they *must* investigate thoroughly and vigorously, both
for his protection and that of the child leveling the allegations.
With competent counsel and strong support, he’ll be able to weather
the storm and eventually clear his name.
If you need more information, please do not hesitate to ask for
clarification. I understand that this is a very complicated
situation, and that you may have further questions. I will be glad to
assist you.
--Missy
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