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Q: Missing children/ Wyoming County, Pennsylvania, 1974- 1980 ( Answered 5 out of 5 stars,   6 Comments )
Question  
Subject: Missing children/ Wyoming County, Pennsylvania, 1974- 1980
Category: Reference, Education and News > Teaching and Research
Asked by: rha-ga
List Price: $10.00
Posted: 09 Jun 2003 18:38 PDT
Expires: 09 Jul 2003 18:38 PDT
Question ID: 215323
List of names of all children under ten reported missing in the area
of Wyoming County, Pennsylvania, between 1974- 1980, only in the
months of June, July, August or September.  In reply, please include
source of information and specific locations of last appearances of
child/children.  I believe this question is not answerable through
internet research as the time period is before widespread net
archiving.  I researched it on the net for 10+ hours, tried FBI,
missing children sites, Pennsylvania State Police, even called them--
no luck.  Likeliest source would be newspaper articles from the
Scranton Times or the Tunkhannock Republican and New Age, or maybe the
Philadelphia Inquirer.  All of which are available only on microfilm
for those dates.  However, I don't need the whole year information--
only the months of June, July, August and September.  I don't want to
pay much for a "couldn't find anything" answer, because that will just mean
I will have to look through the microfilm myself when I get it on
interlibrary loan.  However, I will pay $100 for a name with a
location and a source that backs it up.

Request for Question Clarification by tutuzdad-ga on 09 Jun 2003 18:52 PDT
Just to confirm, are you seeking onluy the months of June, July,
August or September for each year 1974-1980? In addition, please
clarify the issue of resolved cases. Are you also seeking the names
and information concerning missing children in these time frames who
were eventually located, whether dead or alive?

Regards;
tutuzdad-ga

Clarification of Question by rha-ga on 09 Jun 2003 20:47 PDT
Thanks for responding so quickly.  Yes, I am ONLY seeking the names of
children who were reported missing in June, July, August or September
of 1974, 1975, 1976, 1977, 1978, 1979 or 1980, because I think that
will really help narrow the search.  I mean, if it is possible to just
search the whole time period, from 1974- 1980, that would be great,
but I know this is a large task.  I have a feeling that the case I am
trying to locate, if it was reported, occurred during the summer or
early fall.  I could be wrong, but that is what I am focusing on now
because otherwise it seems like to large a task.

I am actually looking for a case in which the child was not found
alive.  In fact, any information of a suspicious nature during this
time period would help my search, and something like unidentified
child's bones found, or unidentified child's body found, would
definitely qualify as what I am looking for and I would gratefully pay
$100 for that information.

Thank you very much for your interest in helping me with this
research.

Request for Question Clarification by tutuzdad-ga on 09 Jun 2003 21:07 PDT
I am actually in law enforcement (22+ years) and I can tell you now
that we have some problems. First, its going to be hard if not
impossible to guess what you already know. If you can share details
with us it would be helpful. Second, being a certified NCIC user
myself, I can tell you that missing people (especially those listed as
runaways or missing but not endangered) are purged automoatically from
the system upon turning 21 years of age (18 in some jurisdictions).
Finally, local crime information centers (that means local to the
state in which they operate) don't require documentation to be kept
more than five years at most in non-endangered missing person cases.

We're going to have to rely on "you" to tell "us" what you need and
we'll go out there and see if we can find it. Past experience with
questions like this has taught us that the guessing game doesn't work
and it likley won't attract too many researchers for you.

Give it some thought. Maybe you can carefully word what you need to
say to us and we can start this ball rolling for you again.

Regards;
tutuzdad-ga

Clarification of Question by rha-ga on 09 Jun 2003 21:37 PDT
I hear what you are saying about the guessing game, so I'll provide
more details.  I recently remembered what appeared to be me, as a very
young child, witnessing an event that resulted in the death of a child
who seemed to be around four, but I am not sure if that is correct, so
that is why I put the years 1974- 1980.  My best guess is that it was
1975.   This memory includes details which make it appear to me very
unlikely a body was ever found.   I understand that many people are
very reluctant to give credence to these kinds of traumatic memories
that emerge many years afterwards, and in a world full of unsolved
crimes and traumas of all kinds, I can understand that there isn't
much of a motivation for the police in Tunkhannock, with whom I have
already talked, to take much of an interest.  I just want to know if
there is any mention of this child, anywhere... personally, I am
convinced of the veracity of the memory because of the enormously
distressing impact it has had on me, and also because it makes sense
of certain distressing flashbacks I have had prior to uncovering it,
and also because elements of the event showed up in some writing I
did, many years before I got the memory back.   I'm not looking for
justice because ... it's just the fact that many horrible things
happen to many people and there is really nothing the criminal justice
system can do about every thing... but I feel I should make sure I
have done what I can to get any facts that may still be available.  I
have a sense of owing her for my life, because it could have very
easily been me, and I guess I would just like to know her name, if it
is out there to be found, so that I can pay my respects.

Request for Question Clarification by tutuzdad-ga on 10 Jun 2003 18:02 PDT
Thank you for the additional information. While I have a lifetime of
experience in dealing with people and am very well schooled in
techniques that are designed to jog people's memory of past events
(ie, victims, witnesses, etc), I am not a counselor. However, I wish
we could talk candidly about this in detail, although we must accept
the fact that it really isn't possible in this forum. I do have a few
questions more though, if you would care to enlighten me:

What age were you and what age was the "victim" at the time of this
event to the best of your recollection?

Do you recall any events immediatley thereafter? Did people get
involved? Were you silent (or silenced) about ordeal.

Did you know this child or think you might have known her when you
were a child and just can't recall her name? - You said you'd like to
know her name, but I'm wondering how you came to be in the close
proximity of this child at the time of the event and how it could just
as easily have been you who was harmed rather than her. If you did not
know the child, is it the mere fact that "she" was randomly selected
instead of you that makes you feel indebted to her? (re: quote "pay my
respects").

How certain are you that this event took place in Tunkhannock and is
it absolutely necessary to seek info regarding abductions county wide?
This could help narrow a wide area down to a much smaller one.

How certain are you that the child died as a result of this incident?
Your reference to "bones" and so forth leads one to believe that you
are certain that a death occured. Can you further explain why that is?

Finally, what is the liklihood that this child you are remembering who
endured this awful treatment at the hands of an attacker is, in fact,
yourself?

In the meantime, I am still searching based on what I've already
gotten from you...

Regards;
tutuzdad-ga

Clarification of Question by rha-ga on 10 Jun 2003 22:08 PDT
I greatly appreciate your help, and I understand your questions.   
Particularly, it makes sense to ask if perhaps I am really remembering
something that happened to me, which made me fear I was going to die,
when in fact I obviously did not!  However, as Lenore Terr describes
in the book 'Unchained Memories: True Stories of Traumatic Memories,
Lost and Found,' false memories tend to be accompanied by no
corresponding symptoms or signs, whereas true ones do.  The severity
of my symptoms and the very eerie way that this exact event is
something I have (unkown to me until now) been working through my
subconscious in dreams, and things I have written, makes me sure that
it really happened.  I can see the event that precipated the child's
death (it was a criminal activity that accidentally resulted in
death), and worse, I can very, very clearly see a body in a creek,
which was.. rendered unidentifiable.  To try to be more precise,
criminal activities involving children were occurring frequently at
this time, and I remember being told that if I did not comply with
these activities, then what happened to that girl would happen to me. 
Therefore, in answer to your question of what happened afterwards, it
appears to me that the body was known to not just the attacker but to
a group of habitual offenders, who subsequently made it disappear. 
Therefore, when I think about it, because the mileu was one of extreme
criminal activity, it is possible that the child, like me, was one of
the unfortunate group who were habitually unsafe, to the extent that
instead of reporting her missing, her disappearance might have been
hidden.
So I believe that a child died in Tunkhannock, but the more I answer
your questions, the less I feel that I will ever find out who it was. 
 I guess in my mind I was hoping it was some child who lived in the
neighborhood, whose parents reported her missing.  And that all that
would need to be done is look up missing children in Wyoming County,
and find a name, and be able to feel like, if I am a responsible human
being, then I have done what I could to show respect for her life.  If
I doubt my memory, then I can easily shrug my shoulders; I can say
things to myself like, "oh such things don't happen!" or "well, I'm
just crazy."  That way I don't have to feel this obligation to at
least do the most minimal possible thing, to at least find out if
anyone was reported missing.  But if I am a responsible and sane
person, then how can I just shrug my shoulders?  I have suspected
something like this may have happened during my extremely traumatic
childhood, but of course I shrugged my shoulders at such an extreme
idea until this memory forced me to confont it.   To answer your other
questions, my strongest sense is that she was about four and so was I.
 Certainly I said nothing about it, and since there was already
ongoing criminal activity occurring, I would guess that this
additional criminal activity was kept as secret as the rest of it was.
 Which makes me realize just how futile this effort probably really
is.  But I don't think I would have realized just how unlikely it is
that she was ever reported anywhere, unless you had asked me all these
questions.  The high likelihood that, given the criminal environment,
this is absolutely unresolvable, makes me feel like once the research
options have been explored, I will have actually done all I can do--- 
which is the best I can do to respect her life.

Request for Question Clarification by tutuzdad-ga on 11 Jun 2003 09:58 PDT
I apppreciate your willingness to share your memories with me. It
might be beneficial in either the resolution of your question or the
resolution of you conflict. I'm pleased that this effort has at least
provided something meaningful to you. I still have some work to do on
this and I'll get back to you if I have more questions.

regards;
tutuzdad-ga

Clarification of Question by rha-ga on 12 Jun 2003 23:04 PDT
Dear Tutuzdad-ga, 

Thank you so much for all your help.  Your questions helped me to
think much more clearly about the likelihood of finding an answer.  I
went from thinking, "Oh, it's just GOT to be in a missing person
report" to realizing that, due to the very widespread nature of
criminal activity in this circle of people, the likelihood that
anything was reported-- particularly in the actual area in which it
occurred-- is just about zero.   I really liked your suggestions about
trying to search under different headings like "unidentified bodies"
but my memory is very graphic about what was done to the body, and it
was purposefully rendered  unrecoverable.   Overall, this search and
your questions made me more able to come to terms with what I have
remembered, and although I can't get into all the details, now that I
have worked through this over the past week, particularly because of
your questions, I have come to feel strongly that the chance of
evidence of anything-- missing child, body, any remains, unsolved
crime-- is almost zero.  To have progressed from obsessively
searching, to satisfied that searching is futile, has given me a great
deal of peace of mind.  Besides my friends, therapist, and other
support systems, I know that your efforts have really contributed to
helping me come to a place of acceptance so quickly.
Your help really made me feel that I have done what I can do to pay my
respects, and your questions and the ways they helped me clarify the
situation have also helped me to begin undoing the survivor's guilt
that I have carried deep inside me almost all my life.

I am going out of town for a week to recuperate from all of this, into
the mountains where I won't be near a phone or e-mail or anything and
I can just remember that this is a world to be grateful for, after
all.

From my heart, thank you, thank you. 

Sincerely, 
rha-ga

Clarification of Question by rha-ga on 12 Jun 2003 23:37 PDT
Tutuzdad-ga,

Since this is the first time I have used google answers, I am having a
difficult time finding the button to click to compensate you for your
tremendous help, which, I can't emphasize enough, has been incredibly
meaningful to me.   Because YOU were looking through newspapers,
keywords and archives, I was able to focus on coming to terms with
what I witnessed when I was a child.  Because of your help, I feel
that everything that can be done to verify her death, has been done--
because it is just a sitution in which it can't be verified.  However,
I can pay my respects to her by having done everything I could to find
out about her.  More importantly, I can accept that even if I am the
only (non-criminal) person who bears witness to her fate, that is
enough.  The peace of mind that has brought me, is just as important
to me as having a name.

I have the feeling that the reason I am encountering difficulty is
that all our correspondence has been under the rubric of
'clarifications,' and that for me to access the payment options, there
needs to be an official 'answer.'  So, if you could make a post under
the 'answer' category, I would joyfully make good on my offer of $100
for an answer.  I apologize that there will be a week's delay before I
am able to do so, due to my immediate plan to recuperate far away from
phones and e-mail (I am leaving for the airport in about five hours!) 
I really can't thank you enough-- your help very materially
contributed to my ability to cope with this memory and to begin to
heal from it, and therefore I look forward to being able to thank you
in deed, as well as in words, when I return.

Sincerely, 
rha-ga
Answer  
Subject: Re: Missing children/ Wyoming County, Pennsylvania, 1974- 1980
Answered By: tutuzdad-ga on 13 Jun 2003 13:50 PDT
Rated:5 out of 5 stars
 
Dear rha-ga;

Thank you for allowing me an opportunity to work with you on your
quest to find solace in this matter. While I feel a bit odd accepting
your reward (and your very generous offering) for what ultimately
became speculation of a negative nature, it is refreshing to work for
someone who is not only willing to accept “no” as an answer but to so
generously reward the effort it took to come to such a conclusion. I
am genuinely pleased that our interaction here has been a positive one
for you and that the search itself has provided a measure of
resolution.

I don’t normally become so personally involved with customers but in
this instance, because the issue meant so much to you (and since I am
an investigative researcher both by nature and occupation) I took
special interest in this conflict of yours. It saddens me to know that
you have been so tormented by your memories, but it heartens me to
know that you are on the road to recovery as a direct result of your
experience here. You seem like a very intelligent, sensitive and
sincere person and I have no doubt that you will find the peace you
are looking for.

From an old police offer that has spent his entire adult life
witnessing, rationalizing and overcoming the unspeakable, I offer you
this to remember in your quest:

Bad things DO happen to some good people – this is an obvious and
unavoidable reality. Nevertheless, and in spite of the relatively
small minority of evil people who share it with us, the world remains
an immensely magnificent place in which we can all live an otherwise
spectacular, productive and miraculous existence. Personally (and this
merely my opinion, unrelated to any particular religious belief,
though I do have one), I do not subscribe to the notion that
“everything happens for a reason” – as if one act is predestined in
order to enable some future purpose. What I do believe is that
everything that happens to us in our lives, even if it is undesirable,
abhorrent, and seemingly unbearable, it still has “meaning” and
“value” to our character. When these bad, but meaningful things occur
in our lives, they often present opportunities to us that we would not
otherwise be afforded. To restore order to the “spectacular and
miraculous life” you are going to live from this day forward, you need
only to seek these opportunities out and exploit them to the fullest
extent possible. If you do, and these opportunities prove advantageous
to you, or to someone else, in any way, no matter how small, perhaps
your suffering will not be without reward. Clearly, surviving the
unbearable is a personal testament to one’s strength and character,
but to turn the event to your advantage is to control it and claim
victory over it…once and for all.

I wish you the best life has to offer and I welcome your rating and
your final comments. I look forward to working with you again under
much happier circumstances in the near future. Thank you for bringing
your question to us.

Best regards;
Tutuzdad-ga

Clarification of Answer by tutuzdad-ga on 20 Jun 2003 16:58 PDT
Dear rha-ga:

In the last week or so I have reflected on this interaction between us
often and I have revisted this question a number of time during your
absence. I thought I'd check in on you to see if you are ok and if
your vacation was productive. I hope this message finds you well.

Regards;
tutuzdad-ga

Clarification of Answer by tutuzdad-ga on 27 Jun 2003 12:00 PDT
I have not heard back from you and frankly, I am a bit concerned. I
hope you were able to sufficiently deal with your issues and that you
are able to post a note back to me soon.

Regards;
tutuzdad-ga

Clarification of Answer by tutuzdad-ga on 27 Jun 2003 18:33 PDT
Thank you so very much for your generosity! I am even more pleased to
know that I have finally found you well following your absence, and on
the road to a more peaceful and productive life. Now we can both rest
much easier.

Regards;
tutuzdad-ga
rha-ga rated this answer:5 out of 5 stars and gave an additional tip of: $100.00
It is absolutely impossible for me to express how incredibly helpful
Tutuzdad-ga was in helping me with my question.  His efforts, his
tact, his articulateness, and his concern and compassion were deeply
healing, and I consider it a great blessing that I am a human being
sharing this same planet with a person of his caliber.  To paraphrase
my last comment in our correspondence, I am a more whole person
because of his questions and answer to my original question, and I
believe that the kind of human being that he is, has helped me to
achieve greater potential as a human being myself.   His help was far
beyond any expectations I had for being helped in this matter; it was
absolutely outstanding.  I am just deeply and sincerely grateful, and
I am very enthusiastic about being able to express these feelings not
just in words, but in money as well!!

Comments  
Subject: Re: Missing children/ Wyoming County, Pennsylvania, 1974- 1980
From: mwalcoff-ga on 09 Jun 2003 20:19 PDT
 
I'm afraid this is going to be a tough one to answer. My guess is only
a small portion of missing-children reports wind up in the newspaper,
and I doubt the local police departments have detailed blotters back
that far.
Subject: Re: Missing children/ Wyoming County, Pennsylvania, 1974- 1980
From: rha-ga on 09 Jun 2003 20:59 PDT
 
mwalcoff-ga:

I deeply appreciated your comment.  I think it's true, that not all
missing-children reports end up in the newspaper.  What you said about
police blotters seems reasonable also.  The Pennsylvania State Police
barracks in Tunkhannock told me today that they have no record of a
missing child for that time period.  However, it is such a small area,
with really low population (even today Wyoming County has only about
30,000 people) that perhaps some mention of something may have found
its way into a local paper back then... who knows, maybe some one will
see this question and remember some rumors of something weird going on
in Tunkhannock in the 70's... I just want to make sure that I have
exhausted all my research options before giving up on getting the
facts.   If I have to,  I'm willing to accept that some things are
never resolved... but not until I give it my best effort  (which
includes some help from researchers like you!!)  Thanks again for your
comment.
Subject: Re: Missing children/ Wyoming County, Pennsylvania, 1974- 1980
From: tutuzdad-ga on 12 Jun 2003 09:30 PDT
 
Dear rha-ga:

I'm sorry to say that I haven't discovered anything even remotely
similar to the events you described, but of course that is not to say
that it did not happen. I searched newspapers, keywords, archives and
came up empty handed.

I disagree with the comment, however that "...only a small portion of
missing-children reports wind up in the newspaper" and "...doubt the
local police departments have detailed blotters back that far".
MIssing children, even in the 70's were often reported in the news
especially one that would have been four years old at the time. As for
"blotters", these are routinely kept for decades. My own department
for example has blotters dating back to the 1930's. Having said that,
I recommend you don't give up on these sources based on speculation
that they would be useless pursuits.

I suggest you approach this from another direction. Seek reports
through your local departments about "found human remains", recovered
bodies/parts/bones, unsolved homicides, accidental deaths, child
abuse, abductions, etc as these incident "titles" or classifications
may be how the crime was reported if it was reported at all.

Check with the local coroner's office, medical examiner, funeral homes
and so on to see if in fact a body was found during this time frame. A
retired sheriff or deputy, doctor, nurse or paramedic from this period
might also be a good source of information.

I am disappointed that I could not have helped you more. I had really
hoped to shed some light on your memories from the past. I wish you
luck in your search.

Regards;
tutuzdad-ga
Subject: Re: Missing children/ Wyoming County, Pennsylvania, 1974- 1980
From: tutuzdad-ga on 27 Jun 2003 12:01 PDT
 
I have not heard back from you and frankly, I am a bit concerned. I
hope you were able to sufficiently deal with your issues and that you
are able to post a note back to me soon.
 
Regards; 
tutuzdad-ga
Subject: Enormous Thank You
From: rha-ga on 27 Jun 2003 17:47 PDT
 
Dear Tutuzdad-ga,

Thanks for writing back.  I started writing my response, then got a
little overwhelmed and found it difficult to face again.  But this is
what I wrote and didn’t quite finish when I got home:

I just returned from my week long meditation retreat, and I'd like to
share the meditation I had the first night I was there.

As I mentioned, I was struggling with a lot of guilt about the idea
that I lived and this other girl died.  When I closed my eyes and
began to meditate, again, I saw her body in the creek, a pretty
gruesome sight, and I felt horrified and terrible, as usual.  Yet this
time, I felt as though the presence of her spirit was still there--
even though her body was no longer whole.  As this presence grew
stronger, I felt that it was a loving presence, and I felt that far
from hating me, she actually loved me and wanted to help me.

It might be useful to mention that I am an extremely serious student
of meditation and yoga, and although I don't follow any organized
spiritual system, I am very dedicated to what could be described as
the Buddhist or Taoist goals of letting go of the ego, shedding the
constraints of the personality so that out of a space of inner
emptiness, there can emerge a radiant communion with the experience of
being.  I have experienced that kind of radiant communion frequently
enough, although for relatively short periods of time, to know that it
really does exist.  In comparison to this experience, 'normal' life
goals like material success are not interesting to me.  No doubt, my
dedication to these spiritual goals is deeply influenced by the
extremity of my life experiences.

At any rate, the 'help' that the girl's spirit seemed to be offering
me was guidance in the realm of my spiritual endeavors.  The
overwhelming sense that her spirit was whole even if her body was not,
somehow obliterated the sense of horror I have been carrying with me
about this experience.  Although there is no way to explain it
rationally, I feel liberated from the gruesomeness of not just this
crime, but the massive crime that was my whole childhood-- because I
know that regardless of even the most incomprehensible, reprehensible
acts, the spirit always remains intact.  Whether in death, or in life.
 I feel my spirit is whole regardless of what was done to me. In this
way, this experience changed from being unbearable and tormenting, to
being a kind of gift of knowledge and faith.  Not that I would seek
such a thing out!-- but because it happened and can't be changed, by
abiding with it, and visiting it over and over and over, somehow the
gift of its meaning for me finally unfolded.

What you said about the meaning of "undesirable, abhorrent, and
seemingly unbearable" events is one of the clearest, most powerful
explanations I have ever read.  I have struggled against the "it's
predestined" train of thought which is so prevalent in some of the
spiritual recovery literature. The idea that I chose my parents and
that I was predestined to be tortured by them in order to develop my
soul is a bit of a stretch.  On the other hand, who I am is thoroughly
shaped by my struggle to overcome my childhood, and I like who I am
now.  I agree 1000% that to truly repossess the miraculous nature of
living, it helps to not only survive and overcome, but to master one's
challenges-- to use them to restore order to one's world.  As a result
of my life experiences, I have come to know, not just intellectually,
but actually, that ANYTHING can happen to anyone, anywhere.  My
openness about talking about my experiences has helped other people to
begin looking at their own experiences, and I've been told I have been
a source of inspiration in some people's recovery.  I think who we ARE
is more important than what we SAY, and as a living example of someone
who has surmounted the seemingly unspeakable and unbearable, I feel
... a certain peace.

---
Well, that was what I wrote when I came back from my retreat.  It has
such a summing up kind of tone to it, when really, the truth is that I
have my moments of peace, and I really do feel like I have much more
peace surrounding this experience… but this is just one of hundreds
and hundreds of horrible experiences I have to accept and fully
integrate.  I am incredibly lucky to have the resources and support
that I have.  For what I’ve been through, I’m incredibly functional
and mentally healthy, and I have confidence that I really will be able
to achieve my spiritual goals.  But, when I look at the amount of time
and effort I’ve put into my own healing, and the enormous amounts of
time, energy and resources my recovery has taken and continues to
take, I understand why so many people spend their whole lives living
with the pain of their childhoods still locked inside them—- because
what it takes to overcome it can be more difficult than climbing Mt.
Everest. That’s my theory about why the world is the way it is. 
Experiences like mine may be somewhat on the extreme end of the scale
in this country, but by and large, war, rape, torture, and a million
lesser injuries to the soul go on day by day, perpetrated by people
who are acting out the pain they hold inside them from the injuries
their souls received from people who were only acting out the pain of
their soul’s injuries, and on and on… this cyclical process just
stretches back into history.  Pretending that all this pain does not
exist is precisely what helps to perpetuate it.  I feel good that I am
doing my part to heal my pain instead of passing it on.  And that’s
the solution to the problem of violence, it seems to me.

So.  I really am okay, and because I see my therapist three times a
week, and I go to ten yoga classes a week and I let myself cry every
day, I am only going to keep getting better.  It took me a little
longer than I wanted to respond to our correspondence, and I
appreciate your concern and patience.  Your last note spurred me to
sit here and face it, when I had been kind of… letting it sit a bit. 
I guess I just wanted to get to a place where I felt, yeah, I am okay
with this memory.  And in writing this I realize that, like all my
memories, it’s a process that happens in layers over time, but there
is a phase where the initial shock and horror wear off and there is
acceptance, and even a different perspective, including seeing gifts
it brings and ways that I can see it as contributing to who I am now,
in a positive way.  I was feeling very euphoric after coming home from
the meditation retreat, and now I feel more balanced, and I can see
that the process is not finished, but it’s also no longer the burden
that it was.  I think most of all I waited to respond because, as I
write this, I feel that this experience has really changed me, and I
was seeking an answer, some kind of insight into what that change is. 
But I don’t know what that change is, I only know that it is there
inside me.  I think one of my main tasks now is to find out what that
change is, and to grow further and deeper into it.  It feels very
strong, and balanced, and right.  As if I am stepping into a place of
truth quite vaster than I ever had access to before.  Yeah, if
anything, it is that I am much more solid as a human being because I
know my own history so much more fully.  It has taken years and years…
over a decade, actually, of therapy and struggle to be in a safe
enough space to uncover and sustain the shock of this memory…  and now
I have, with your help.  Ten years ago, without the internet, this
would have been exponentially more difficult.  I started out this
search because I felt such a desperate need to find out who she was,
but I ended up realizing that I don’t need to know who she was in
order to know who I am; to know the truth.  The truth is, it’s the
kind of world where things like this certainly happen, full of
violence and pain; but it’s also the kind of world where the miracle
of a chance for recovery like mine exists as well.  If everyone knew
the truth of their own lives, and could withstand it and heal it, no
one would pass any of it on.

Thank you beyond words for all your help.  Somewhere in the world,
perhaps in the same city or thousands of miles away, I am a more whole
person because of your compassion, with renewed faith in what it means
to be human and a greater capacity to realize my own potential as a
human being.

Sincerely, 
Rha-ga
Subject: Re: Missing children/ Wyoming County, Pennsylvania, 1974- 1980
From: tlspiegel-ga on 29 Jun 2003 21:13 PDT
 
The following statement by my colleague tutuzdad is very true:

"MIssing children, even in the 70's were often reported in the news
especially one that would have been four years old at the time."

My son went 'missing' in 1978 and was not only front page news for 3
days, but it was also picked up by newswires (AP) and the information
and his photo were displayed on the national nightly news with Dan
Rather.

tlspiegel

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