Tomorrow, I'm off to the hospital for a scan (it's the sinuses) and I
am required to state that 'I am certain that I am not pregnant'.

But, how can anyone possibly be 'certain'?

I have not passed the menopause and I've never had a hysterectomy but
I understand that there have been occasions when the first time the
person knew that she was preggers was when the baby arrived.

Then, of course, there's been at least one case of a virgin birth.

Also, I suppose that I could be raped whilst I'm strapped in the
scanning machine?

Now, I don't want to sign this form without being satisfied beyond
reasonable doubt, so can anyone tell me what the chances are of any
male (whose fathered two delightful daughters) of being preggers?

Please put my mind at rest.

Bryan

Hi Bryan,

Sorry to disappoint you, but male pregnancy is theoretically possible.
 It hasn't happened yet, so far as I can tell, but there is an
infinitesmally small chance that you could be the first.

Now, initially, I should dispel the rumor that a male pregnancy has
already occurred.  Arnold Schwarzenegger, in fact, did not get
pregnant during the filming of Junior.  (Though we must wonder how the
child of Ahnold and Emma Thompson would turn out.)

Moreover, the site called Male Pregnancy (
http://www.malepregnancy.com/ ) is an elaborate hoax -- performance
art, apparently.  This is confirmed beyond doubt by its inclusion in
the following Google directory:

"Society > Activism > Media > Culture Jamming > Hoaxes"
Google Directory
http://directory.google.com/Top/Society/Activism/Media/Culture_Jamming/Hoaxes/?il=1

On a more serious note, the purpose of the Male Pregnancy site is
explained by the good people at About.com and The Urban Legends
Reference Pages:

"Art Imitates Tabloids", by David Emery
About.com: Urban Legends and Folklore
http://urbanlegends.about.com/library/weekly/aa100400a.htm?once=true&terms=male+pregnancy

"A Womb of His Own" [Note: Let us hope that the estate of Virginia
Woolf does not take legal action against this clever pun!]
The Urban Legends Reference Pages
http://www.snopes.com/pregnant/malepreg.htm

But male pregnancy is not wholly science fiction anymore.  The pages I
cite above note that a man could have a pregnancy -- an ectopic
pregnancy, specifically -- if one were to implant an embryo properly
in the man's abdomen, administer hormones, etc.

Say, your doctor's name wouldn't happen to be Chen Huanran, would it? 
If so, watch out -- he is seeking patients to test his technique for
inducing male pregnancy.  (Fortunately for you, he works in Beijing,
and I assume that you're not traveling that far for your sinus scan.)

"Male Pregnancy Now an Option, Beijing Surgeon Says" (May 29, 2002)
China Internet Information Center
http://www.china.org.cn/english/2002/May/33452.htm

However, there is a doctor closer to home -- a Lord, no less! -- who
believes in the possibility of male pregnancies.  So you might want to
ask your doctor whether he subscribes to such views.

"Possibility of Male Pregnancy" [see article in the middle of the
page]
Midwife Archives
http://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/malepreg.html

On a more philosophical level, you can peruse the following
pro-and-con views on the prospect of male pregnancy.  Perhaps you'll
be convinced that it's time has come, and volunteer!

"Male pregnancy is the future", by Lori Andrews (May 8, 2002)
The Daily Princetonian
http://www.dailyprincetonian.com/archives/2002/05/08/opinion/5154.shtml

"Testosterone is dangerous", by Lee Silver (May 8, 2002)
The Daily Princetonian
http://www.dailyprincetonian.com/archives/2002/05/08/opinion/5153.shtml

Good luck with your tests tomorrow.

- justaskscott-ga


Search terms used on Google:

"male pregnancy"
"men get pregnant"

[You might want to try searching for these terms on Google Groups, for
even more opinions on the subject!]

---

Clarification of Answer by justaskscott-ga on 18 Jun 2003 22:09 PDT

You never know -- I could be male, I could be female -- Scott could be
my first name or last.  It's like that cartoon where one dog says to
the other: "On the Internet, no one knows you're a dog."  So, for all
you know, your question has been answered by a very well-trained dog
-- or a roomful of monkeys typing on computers.  Amazing what those
monkeys can do nowadays.  ;-)

---

Request for Answer Clarification by probonopublico-ga on 19 Jun 2003 03:12 PDT

Sorry, Justaskscott

I was referring to THE Question on the Hospital Form which, of course,
wasn't a question ... I had not intended to suggest that MY Question
(which you answered so admirably) was sexist.

Anyhow, a most delightful receptionist (called Susie) told me that
loads of males sign the certificate anyway.

An equally delightful operator (Called Helen) performed the scan.

I even found a parking spot nearby ... A perfect start to any day.

KR

Bryan

---

Clarification of Answer by justaskscott-ga on 19 Jun 2003 10:29 PDT

Yes, well, I had thought that "anyone" in your GA question included
males, but I figured that maybe you were assuming that a female would
answer it.

Anyway, all's well that ends well!

Many thanks, Justaskscott, et al

My mind is now at rest.

However, I now see that the question was only directed at females
which, in my view, is absolutely sexist.

It's always the same ...

Women rule the world.

PB

Have a peek at this one :

The First Male Pregnancy
http://www.malepregnancy.com/


P.S.

It's a hoax.

Well, as Eric Idle pointed out in the Python classic "The Life of
Brian"  (or should that be "The Life of Bryan"?) "It's every man's
right to have babies if he wants them."

"LORETTA: I want to have babies.

REG: You want to have babies?!

LORETTA: It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.

REG: But... you can't have babies.

LORETTA: Don't you oppress me.

REG: I'm not oppressing you, Stan. You haven't got a womb! Where's the
foetus going to gestate?! You going to keep it in a box?!"
http://www.stone-dead.asn.au/albums-cds/sketches/life-of-brian/stan-loretta.html

All the best!

THX1138

http://a1468.g.akamai.net/f/1468/580/1d/pics.drugstore.com/prodimg/12558/200.jpg

Skipped your last cycle, did you dearie?

--Missy

Upon reading this most peculiar question, the first thing that
occurred to me was...

Naughty, naughty Daisy! :-D

Hang out for a little bit...
I feel some Shakespeare coming on...

Ace, C'mon gal ...

We're all waiting with baited breath.

Or is it bated breath?

Or just bad breath?

Why do women always keep us waiting?

KR
PB

Better watch which mobile phone company you are using.  Anyone see the
new Verizon Wireless commerical?