Absolutly beautiful 24 year old blonde daughter living and working in
Atlanta.  She has net worth approaching one million...I know, I gave
it to her...she is having a terrible time meeting marriage minded
men...What can she do to find a guy in Atlaanta, Georgia....thanks,
Randy

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Request for Question Clarification by mvguy-ga on 10 Jul 2003 07:11 PDT

Could you tell us a bit more about your daughter?  What are her
interests?  What kind of work does she do?  What religion does she
follow? Is the problem that she doesn't meet guys, or that she meets
the wrong guys, or that she can't maintain a relationship with the
guys she likes?  What is her personality like?   It would be easy for
me or another Researcher to provide you with a generic list of
resources in Atlanta, but we really could be of more help if we had
more information.  Thanks.

Problem solved, tell her to give me a call :)

She must widen her social circle.

Randy,

Your daughter is so lucky to have such a wonderful father who cares so
much about her.

I'd like to offer you some things to consider:

1) Does your daughter talk about *wanting* to be married? If not,
perhaps it is because she is quite happy with her life the way that it
is right now. If she likes her job, has some nice friends with whom
she really enjoys spending time, and participates in things that she
enjoys, it is quite likely that she will meet just the right person at
one point -- but in the meantime, she is living her life to the
fullest, and enjoying it.

2) Unless it's been kept a secret, there is a downside for your
daughter in having all that money. Anytime she meets someone who might
be a prospective life partner, she is going to have to take a great
deal of time with the relationship to ensure that that person is truly
only interested in her, and not in her money. My spouse, who is a
physician, is only half-joking when he says that he is really glad
that he met me and we spent 9 years together while he was an
impoverished med student and resident, because if instead he met
someone now, he could never be sure that they were truly interested in
him and not just looking for a doctor to marry. Your daughter probably
has similar concerns.

3) It's better for your daughter to be unmarried and content (or even
unmarried and lonely), than to be married and absolutely miserable.
Almost all of my high-school friends got married within 5 years of
graduation. I would guess that at least 70% of those women then got
divorced (and a couple of them married and divorced again!).
Meanwhile, I went to college, graduated, got a job, participated in
activities I enjoyed, met a lot of great people, made a few VERY close
friends, and did my thing. I was 32 when I met my husband, and 37 when
we married. Sure, there were times in my life when I was lonely, but
the wait was *absolutely* worth it.

If your daughter has expressed a desire to meet someone and get
married, then you will be able to help her figure out ways to meet
people with similar interests and great personalities by using the
resources that will be provided by the Researcher who Answers this
Question.

But if she hasn't said anything about it, she may be perfectly happy
with things the way they are right now, and she might not appreciate
your attempts at matchmaking, even though they are done with the best
of intentions. So you will want to make sure that if you try to help
her find a partner, you are doing it because it's what she wants, and
not because it's what *you* want for her.

Best Wishes to both you and your daughter!

ace

I married for the first (and only) time at the ripe old age of 32,
long after my parents had written me off as a hopeless spinster. My
husband and I celebrated our 23rd wedding anniversary last week.

Finding "a" husband is not the important thing: finding "THE" husband
is. Sometimes this takes quite a while; perhaps it won't happen at
all. In any case, my observation is that love finds you. There's no
need to go out hunting.

Hi Randy,

I'm just going to echo what Pinkfreud said a little, and lend a bit of
perspective.

I've been married for nearly 13 years - two children, two cats, and a
husband who drives me absolutely nuts.  Sometimes with laughter,
sometimes with the overwhelming desire to kick his butt up over his
head.  Mostly the latter.

We both attribute this to having married young.  We were 20.  Should
have waited until we were 30, because your twenties are just way too
early to make such a life altering decision.  Better to wait and be
certain, than to rush off to get hitched and spend the rest of your
life playing tug-of-war.

--Missy

Ask your daughter to write a list of all of the attributes she would
like to have in a husband then become the list.  Birds of a feather
flock together.  In so doing, she will find that husband without
really looking.

Hi Randy

A watched pot never boils! Less talk about money and less talk about
'marriage' will give your girl greater prospects of meeting her Mr
Right instead of Mr Oh-All-Right. Nothing scares away decent guys more
than a lot of money or a determined marriage seeker. The ones who
would be attracted into marriage by her 'net worth' are not fit to
wipe her boots. With the greatest respect in the world, I urge you
just to relax and let nature take its course. Whether she's wanting
this herself or not, the pressure of your anxiety will only serve as a
negative. I found through experience that the good husbands of this
world land on your doorstep -- or where you least expect them. Stop
looking and let him find her -- and that might happen tomorrow or it
might happen in ten years time. If you want to feel you're doing
*something*, certain old wives have always advised on carrying a rose
quartz crystal, so why not give her a modest little pendant of this
beautiful stone to wear. Don't worry. Be happy. Best wishes to you
both.

...not excluding possible suitors of other enconomic levels...

You may want to look into joining some of the Societal & Country Clubs
in the area and encourage her to participate in the events and
activities to widen her newtork and increase her opportunities for
meeting marriage minded gentlemen.

Society Club events & gatherings

http://www.atlantasociety.com/

http://www.atlantasociety.com/NetCal_Club/NetCal.htm