Hi, GC.
I am ashamed to admit that I use "entitled" in the manner that offends
your officemate.
I don't keep peeves as pets (they bite, and it's impossible to
housebreak 'em), but I do have a few bees in my bonnet -- or is it
bats in my belfry?
Here is the Pinklist of Linguistic Horrors and Abominations:
1. To hone in on.
I don't know why this bothers me so much, but the good old phrase "to
home in on [something]" is disappearing. Its replacement, "hone in
on," apparently takes its metaphor from the sharpening of knives.
What's next? Honing pigeons? Hone, hone on the range? Auggh.
2. Sloppy verb forms.
Even here on GA, I've noticed quite a few instances of "loose" instead
of "lose," as in "I'm going to loose control." This is a puzzlement,
since the words are pronounced quite differently. "Breathe" (a verb)
and "breath" (a noun) are often confused for one another (do a Google
search for "breath deep," and you'll get an astonishing 7,340 hits).
Here again, the sounds of the words are significantly different.
3. Literally.
The word "literally" has been drained of its meaning, and often is
used as a synonym for "figuratively" -- which used to be its opposite!
Did I already say "Auggh?" May I say it again? AUGGH. Think about it,
folks. "She was literally rooted to the spot." Truly? Only in
mythological tales is this likely to be the case (or possibly in the
Weekly World News tabloid).
4. Misappropriation of scientific terms.
"Quantum leap" is commonly used to refer to a huge change, rather than
to a tiny, but significant one. Bleh. "Parameters" as "boundaries"
seems to have come from a confusion with "perimeters." Pfui.
"Schizophrenia" is often used as if it means "multiple personality
disorder." Yick.
5. To beg the question.
"Begging the question" used to be a phrase used primarily by logicians
and by those who mimic logicians (count me among the latter). In its
original sense, begging the question meant using a circular argument,
such as "I am not lying. Since I'm not lying, I must be telling the
truth." Nowadays, the phrase almost always means nothing more than
"raising the issue," as in "The war in Iraq goes on and on, which begs
the question: Is Iraq another Vietnam?"
6. Nonwords and nonsensical phrases.
"Irregardless." "Unthaw." "Unravel." "Unloose." "Alot." "Not hardly."
"I could care less."
7. Syllababble.
I can remember noticing, sometime in the 1960s, that the verb "to
orient" was frequently elongated into "to orientate." Soon thereafter,
"preventive" became "preventative" (and occasionally even
"preventatative.") Heckfire, folks, we don't need a bunch of extra
syllables packed into words. Stretching a word doesn't make the word
any more meaningful. All those extraneous syllables are just noise
pollution; they add nothing to the sense of a sentence. They are full
of sound and fury, signifying nothing, as one of my Scottish ancestors
may have said.
8. Mispronounciation (sic).
If you don't know how to pronounce a word, you should either learn how
or choose another word. The next time I hear someone say "artic"
instead of "arctic," I am gonna go nucular.
9. There is no Item 9.
10. Nattering nitpickers.
Even as I rail against these abominations of usage, I hear a still,
small voice within. It whispers, "Shaddap already. Things change. The
rules of language are set by the users, not by a buncha stuck-up
grammarians in an ivory tower." And, as much as I'd like to squash
that still, small voice like a doodlebug on a hot sidewalk, I must
admit that the voice has a point. Academic snobbery about language is
probably worse than all the complaints I've raised above. The
evolution of language is a process of natural selection; useful words
and usages tend to remain, while awkward ones die out. But, by gum, if
I never hear "asterisk" pronounced as "asterick" again, it'll be too
soon... eck cetera, eck cetera.
==============================
Thank you for providing me with a soapbox upon which to mount my
attack on those with whom I disagree. ;-) I fully expect the
"Comments" section to fill up with critiques of my poor reason. To
those whom I may have offended, I can only say this:
WHEN THE CHIPS ARE DOWN, THE BUFFALO IS EMPTY.
Best,
Pink |
