A friend has invited me to her one-year-old son's baptism. (She
emphasized a baptism not a christening).  Is is appropriate to bring a
gift?  Can I expect good eats?  The invitation says "United Church of
Christ" and says there will be a reception immediately following at
someone's home.  Also, if I can't go, do I send a gift anyway?

Money is always appropriate for all such church occasions: weddings,
baptisms, confimations, first communion, bar mitzvahs.

Hi nkamom...

Besides money, other things like jewellery, picture frames or
silver/gold charms are also considered appropriate.

The most appropriate gift for a baptism is either money, or some
religious trinket (i.e. for Catholics, a large bead rosary for the
baby). If you are not going to the reception, it is still customary to
send a gift. Be advised however, that in many modern churches, it is
no longer expected for one attending a religious ceremony to bring a
gift. Gifts are, however, still very much accepted. My suggestion is
$20-$50.