I received the following, anonymous, message on my cell phone and have
no idea what it means.  I am looking for plausible interpretations or
is it a quote?

"Can I tell you a story?
The other day I went to the bank and they were selling fresh hot
pancakes for a dollar each.
I bought 5 for 6 dollars.
Oh, and then I ran into Joe Schmoe.
Aaagh! He was so mean to me.
I was like, hey, and then he called me a 'whale'.
So I was like, Oh, I really got offended.
And I went out and sat on the curb.
And when I looked up
there was a badger poking a mongoose with a spoon.
I love you (my first name)."

You've got an admirer.

Congratulations.

Make the most of it!

My guess : an overweight female with serious math problems and a vivid
imagination has a crush on you

It was all, like, OK until the part with the badger poking the
mongoose with a spoon. This is not known to happen in the wild, and I
would think that a circus act of this sort would be shouted down by
animal rights activists.

So I am rather suspicious of the seriousness of the message. Either a
whackaloon has a crush on you, or someone is having a bit of fun
tossing the whimsy. Or both.

Hey, I just noticed the excellent username 'bozoonbus.'

A Firesign Theatre fan?

I get random emails like that sometimes as well.  As far as I can
tell, it is probably some sort of AI, which sends random (anonymous)
messages to people...for what, I don't know.  It's weird, but I just
delete it and move on - not really worth $20 to figure it out.