Hello Meraxux-ga,
While I can help you to understand what sort of disorder this abuse
may have caused, I can tell you that the cure will most likely not be
medical. No quick trip to the family doctor will cure it. This is much
more a psychological problem than anything, resulting from the abuse
and trauma. I will start my answer to you by explaining some of the
possible disorders that it may be, and then ways that you can overcome
these symptoms and disorders and hopefully rectify the trouble that is
occurring.
My feeling leads me to believe that part of the symptoms you mentioned
are caused by a Sexual Arousal Disorder. What that is, is that any
part of the sexual response cycle, (desire, arousal, orgasm, and
resolution) is being inhibited and not allowing the person to enjoy a
?normal? healthy sexual life and response. Most Sexual Arousal
Disorders have four categories labeled. (Sexual desire disorders,
sexual arousal disorders, orgasm disorders, and sexual pain
disorders). I focus on the desire and arousal parts of this cycle, as
you mention that this person has a low sex drive. This can also be
referred to as frigidity and female sexual dysfunction, however, I
personally reject those terms, as they seem to imply that there is
something ?wrong? with the person, and have a bit of a negative
connotation to me. This disorder affects over 25% of women, or an
estimated 47,000,000 women.
Sometimes the cause for a Sexual Desire or Arousal Disorder can be
hormonal, fatigue, medications?.things like that. However, I?m
inclined to say since she has suffered depression and abuse, its cause
is psychiatric. I have the feeling the untreated abuse issue is a main
cause of her depression, lack of ability to make an intimate
connection, and anxiety. This is something that should be taken very
seriously, as it may lead to the inability to maintain a close
personal relationship with a significant other.
I think to go any further; we need to focus on her abuse and
depression. You mentioned she has never received treatment for the
abuse side. Abuse that has never been treated or sometimes, even
victims that have received some form of treatment may not be fully
healed. Sexual abuse is a VERY traumatic experience, and without
personal closure and overcoming the feeling associated with it, can
affect a personal sexually and emotionally their whole life.
Most people who have been sexually abused as children have trouble as
adults, which are closely related to the abuse. Such problems are
disinterest or excessive interest in sexual feeling or activities,
fear of dating or close relationships, feelings of shame about the
self, low self-esteem, body image distortions, depression, anxiety
disorders, symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder, such as
flashbacks, hyper vigilance, agitation, and severe trouble sleeping.
This sounds a lot like the symptoms you mentioned in your question.
Being that she has had such a traumatic experience in her life, it
really does make sense that sexually she can not have a deep emotional
connection during sex, has anxiety related to sex, lack of desire, and
has suffered depression.
I?d like to outline an example from an article that may explain this for you.
?One of the more difficult issues that arise is the recollection, by
some individuals, of experiencing a certain amount of physical
pleasure during a molestation or incest. This adds enormously to the
sense of being at fault and "dirty." Thus, one of the aims of
treatment is to educate survivors as to normal physiological
responsiveness. The realization that their feelings are/were normal
helps tremendously toward alleviating the sense of shame.
Even when individuals have spoken of their abuse prior to group
treatment, any pleasurable aspects have typically been denied. The
opportunity to relate to others, who have shared these feelings, as
well as the experience, is part of the healing power of this form of
therapy. The sense of isolation, of being "different from the whole
world," quickly begins to subside. It is only in revealing the secrets
and dealing with the pain that survivors of sexual abuse can and do go
on with their lives ?
I also recommend reading some books about this. These may also help
during and after she seeks treatment and counseling for her abuse and
lingering effects.
Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse
On Amazon, you can, for approx $23.00 USD purchase this book and a
workbook, which is designed to help adults through dealing with their
childhood sexual abuse issues and symptoms relating to the abuse.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1555612253/ref=ase_granmethesereadd/102-5787411-3443310?v=glance&s=books
The Courage to Heal
On Amazon once again, you can purchase this book and workbook
?Based on the premise that "everyone wants to become whole," this book
offers help and encouragement to women who were sexually abused in
childhood. Through moving first person narratives, it illustrates how
to come to terms with the past and work constructively towards the
future?
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0060950668/granmethesereadd/102-5787411-3443310
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0060964375/ref=pd_sxp_elt_l1/102-5787411-3443310
The Survivor?s Guide to Sex
Also available on Amazon, the review states:
?Sex-positive and daring, The Survivor's Guide to Sex will support any
woman's pursuit of pleasure and confidence. In fact, its cheery
outlook may startle those who have been addressing these issues in
guarded terms with a therapist, or who haven't put their fears and
desires into words.?
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1573440795/granmethesereadd/102-5787411-3443310
A book that would be good for her significant other is:
What About Me? A Guide for Men Helping Female Partners Deal with
Childhood Sexual Abuse
?This is a book for the silent sufferers - the millions of men
worldwide who are helping female partners recover from the trauma of
childhood sexual abuse. What About Me? will help men understand the
issues surrounding childhood sexual abuse and prepare them for the
rocky journey through the healing process with a survivor. It will
help them understand why women who are healing say and do certain
things. It will also give them a better understanding of their own
actions and feelings.?
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0921165382/ref=pd_sxp_elt_l1/102-5787411-3443310#product-details
You can read more about abuse and trauma and how it relates to the
issues she is having at these links.
Sexual Arousal Disorder Links:
http://allpsych.com/disorders/sexual/sexualarousal.html
http://cms.psychologytoday.com/conditions/sexarousal.html
http://www.healthatoz.com/healthatoz/Atoz/ency/female_sexual_arousal_disorder_.html
Abuse Links:
http://www.oberlin.edu/counsel/pages/sexabuse.html
http://www.aaets.org/arts/art31.htm
How to find a sexual abuse support group:
http://www.ehow.com/how_8564_find-sexual-abuse.html
Support group information online: (A lot even have online meetings or chats)
http://dmoz.org/Society/Support_Groups/Sexual_Abuse/
http://www.healthyplace.com/Communities/abuse/site/comm_calender.htm
Google Searches used to aid my knowledge:
1. Sexual abuse support groups
://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=sexual%20abuse%20support%20groups&btnG=Google+Search
2. Sexual disorders resulting from abuse
://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=sexual%20disorders%20resulting%20from%20abuse&btnG=Google+Search
3. Sexual arousal disorder
://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=sexual%20arousal%20disorder&btnG=Google+Search
If this answer requires further explanation, please request
clarification before rating it, and I'll be happy to look into this
further.
Nenna-GA
Google Answers Researcher |
