Hi- I've read all the negotation stuff in business school (Getting to
Yes, Bargaining for Advantage) and am familiar with the ads for
Karrass seminars in the inflight mags.  But after all of this, I am
basically dissatisfied with my ability to push and fight for my own
interests.  Even though I know all the theory and techniques, I always
find myself caving in too easily.  I don't like to upset people and I
think this basic orientation is what's holding me back.

So- I wanted to see if anyone knew about either a coach, seminar (or
maybe even a book or tape) that works on this basic problem.  Kind of
changing your attitudes, learning to become more assertive for your
interests.

I want to see if there's anything out there that goes beyond basic
negotation techniques and has really been proven to change people's
ability to get what they want/deserve in bargaining situations.

Thanks.

Have you thought about drama coaching?  It sounds random, but I've
read/seen accounts of self-described "meek" people using drama
coaching to work on strengthening their attitudes and demeanors.

The drama coaches took them through ways to feel comfortable asserting
themselves, speaking well, knowing when to shout or relax depending on
circumstances, etc.

--Joey

Hi!

Try reading "Negotiate This" by Herb Cohan or better yet
"The Power of Nice" by Ronald Shapiro and Mark Jankowski.  Both may be
available at your local public library along with other books on this
topic.  ;-)

Have you heard of Neuro-linguistic Programming or NLP?  This movement
was quite popular in the business world for a time.  Many people seem
to have found it useful.  There is a tremendous amount of information
about it online, both free and unfree.  Do a google search for NLP. 
Look for the authors Bandler and Grinder.  You can take seminars in
NLP.

First off, get clear on what it is you are looking for. It is not
control, or forcing your will on other people. That does not work, as
many wars have proven.
The word for what you seek is enrollment. Enrolling other people into
your vision of whatever it is you have or do.

What I feel would really serve you is to call David Jenkins. He is a
life coach that has assisted many people in becoming millionaires as
well as much higher aspirations such as 'happiness'. You can check out
some of his work here:

http://stores.ebay.com/I-Made-28-492-Dollars-in-ONE-hour_W0QQsspagenameZl2QQtZkm

Buy the deluxe edition and listen to every minute of it.

A training that would assist you would be Harmony Institute,
www.harmonytrainings.com
This training can work miracles in relationships and enrollment. 

It's not what you do, it's how you do it.

Take on your life,

-Rob

The replies to your question seem like good advice, but I don't
believe they completely answered your question.  You already know what
the problem is.  You're not assertive enough to close the deal.  This
isn't a fault.  You're just overly nice to everyone.  The coaching
aspect is good, but I feel I can give you better advice on this.  You
need to learn more about your behavioral style and others.  It's based
on a language called D.I.S.C.  Where D stands for Dominance, I stands
for Influence, S stands for Steadiness and C stands for Compliance. 
Everyone in the world has a certain level of intensity of each one of
these 4 areas of behavioral style.

Here's were the coach comes in or better yet, how about a Sales
Trainer or Sales Coach.  They would use an assessment tool to measure
your DISC or behavioral style.  Next, they should teach you or share
with you the basis around DISC.  Show you were your strengths and
weaknesses are and then show you how you can modify or "adapt" your
behavioral style to meet the needs of your job.

I recommend taking a look at these assessments and how they can be
used not only in Sales Training but in all aspects of your life.  You
can find this information at www.ttiltd.com or
www.managingforsuccess.com.

They also have assessments that can measure your attitudes like you
were asking about.  It is called Personal Interests, Attitudes and
Values or PIAV for short.

I highly recommend this company to anyone who wants to know more about
themselves and how they tick.  I used to work with this team and
continue to consult with them today.  They can recommend you to top
notch Sales Trainers or Coaches anywhere in the world.  Check them
out.  You won't go wrong.

-Sean