I am in my fifth year of divorce with no end in sight.  The ex-wife
has had ten different attorneys.  Although she filed for divorce in
December of 1999 (following a nine month extra marital affair), she
has, through every method possible, managed to avoid the equitable
distribution.  She, I believe, through political connections (her
attorney is the chief coordinator of the Republican Party in our
County and has helped three County judges to be elected-two of whom
were his law firm partners), received a very favorable Alimony pende
lite of $11,038 (38% of my net income) per month plus other costs such
as healthcare insurance.  This allows her (for the last five years) to
remain living in a million dollar house in the most beautiful section
of mainline Philadelphia and in a very comfortable life style.  I
filed for relief of this support for a variety of reasons: there is no
reason for her to continue to live in this house which costs $7-8,000
a month, I have primary custody of my four children ages 20-12 two of
whom voluntarily live with me full time and two who live with me 18
days each month and with her only ten, and the Master who made the
order made several mathematical and formulaic errors in the
calculations.  I filed this petition over two years ago and the case
was litigated over five days and the briefs were submitted four months
ago.  There is still no decision handed down.  Because of the
excessive burden, I have been unable to pay all of my income taxes.  I
have continually asked to try and settle the divorce out of court but
she will not do this.  Also, she has not worked outside the house for
twenty years except for 10 days of substitute teaching one year ago.

In addition, the ex-wife was supposed to pay real estate taxes, school
taxes, water and sewer taxes, and homeowners insurance out of the
monthly support.  She has not paid any of these taxes for over three
years and the house is being put up for Sheriff?s sale in one month. 
I have filed for an emergency petition to make her pay the court
ordered taxes over a year ago and still have not received an answer. 
The judge seems to be inclined against me and although claims to be
very concerned about the mental health of our children, does not rule
in an ?all deliberate speed mode?.

In addition, the ex-wife had a baby six months ago (at age 47) with
her paramour of five years who lives 2000 miles away.  This baby,
through a loophole, is covered by the healthcare insurance that I
provide.  There is no evidence that she receives any child support
from the father so basically I am supporting the baby.

The legal fees at this point are huge and I have just released my
attorney because I did not want to increase the amount of money owed.

The Master of Equitable distribution presented his decision, which was
very favorable to the ex.  He gave her 70% of the assets, all of an
$80,000 escrow fund, no responsibility for any marital taxes
($300,000), and all the contents of the house.  The one bright note
was that he considered the five years of APL as her alimony so she
received none.  She rejected the proposal and has applied for
litigation in about six months.  I believe that she will once again
postpone and delay this court date for at least another year or two.
(Her attorney seems to be working Pro bono).  If he is not working pro
bono, then he is owed about $250,000.  She also owes her other
attorneys and accountants: $67,000, $17,000, and $65,000

My question is:  How can I end this divorce within six months without
having to litigate and with a fair settlement (more fair than the one
handed down by the master)?

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Request for Question Clarification by taxmama-ga on 15 Aug 2004 15:20 PDT

Dear aeriusi,

What's it worth to you for a partial answer?

Here are some things you can do to improve your situation right now. 

1) If she is responsible for all those "real estate taxes, school
taxes, water and sewer taxes, and homeowners insurance out of the
monthly support " - then PAY THEM, Deduct them from her monthly
support, providing her with an itemization of what you've deducted. 

In fact, if she owes back taxes in those areas (or you have paid them)
deduct all the back taxes from the checks, until you are caught up. 
Leave her $500 per month of each check, so she gets a check and an
itemization of the expenses paid on her behalf.

2) Bifurcate the divorce - that means separate out the divorce and
the property settlement issues. You can finalize your divorce itself, 
leaving the property matters to be settled over the next many years.

3) If possible, leave the state. You may be able to file for custody
and child-related issues and even for the asset settlement in a court
in another state, where she is not politically connected. 
I don't know if this will work, but it's worth looking into. 

How's that for a start?

best wishes

Your TaxMama-ga