What can I do best against my constant laziness?

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Clarification of Question by endymi0n-ga on 01 Oct 2004 07:39 PDT

Hi all of you that commented on my question and many thanks in advance.
I was in a really really desperate mood when I decided to spend 3$ on
a question I didn't think anyone could find an answer to. I didn't
think so many people would care. So many people would write. Thanks so
much for now, I think I should make myself more clear, so that you
have a chance to get a picture of my situation. First of all, I'm no
native speaker, if there are any unclear statements, don't hesitate to
tell me.
Well, I'm lazy. I think that's really a part of me, but not the only
one. I think I'm quite torn between my laziness and my ambitiousness,
and I'm so deep in a devilish circle. The point is that I know that I
have so much potential. I'm quite intelligent, nice looking, talented,
and at last I have so many possibilities. I'm a compositor and singer
and made some songs. All the people I know say that they dare to have
a CD of me. I even have offers from main german producers and disc
labels that say just finish your demo and send it. Well. I didn't
manage to finish this demo tape for 7 years now. I didn't even manage
to produce ONE complete song. When I think of this all, I get
depressed as always in the last months. I'm so crushed by my own
pressure to perform. I really sometimes want to have somebody who
kicks me in the a** and says: Man, look at yourself. Look at your
potential. You have everything you need. You even have a complete
music studio. WHY THE HELL DON'T YOU STAND UP AND JUST DO WHAT YOU'RE
BORN FOR?
I don't know. I have tried so many times I won't count anymore. I did
so many wonderful things, but I tend to do everything in a binge. When
I have a goal, I work 24h on it and it's ready. If I quit early, I
never finish the thing I'm just at. There are 100ths of beginnings in
my tray. I even produced albums for other people. But I never finished
one song of my own. Well, you can say to me: Why don't you just
begin?, just like all the others do, including myself.
I just don't have the answer.
Thanks so much for your postings so far, they will help me through the day.
Especially rjain and ru_me2: You touched my heart.

Get Married and have children, that will focus your life.   This is of
course predicated of the hope that someone, somewhere will marry
someone who is so lazy.

Realize that your life will be a lot easier if you aren't so lazy.
Here are two examples:

Laziness spawns procrastination...so you end up doing things at the
last minute. This is not only stressful, but things tend to get done
poorly...so you end up having to "redo" later.

Laziness spawns a dirty, messy environment. But if things are
relatively clean and organized, you can find them more easily (which
equals less stress) and quickly (saving you time).

Laziness may even spawn depression. Everyone wants to do something
with their life, but if you're really lazy, you spend time thinking
about it, but not doing it. This can lead to depression and feelings
of low self-worth.

You can apply this to many other things in life, too.

Kriswrite

I had a dream the other day that I might be have cancer. Hope I do
not, but if I did, how would I want to spend rest of my days?
Definitely not wasting time wathcing TV and being lazy... I would
rather do something constructive and something that many would
remember me for.

Hope you catch the drift.

Rahul

Where the hand goes the mind follows and so goes the heart.

Look where your hand is now. 

Put your hand where you want to go.

Hi EndymiOn,

Come on .. don't be THAT lazy .. tell us more, so that we can really
help ya. That's fairly gutsy though, to ask the question with the
admission that you are lazy.

What an answer from Kriswrite .. right on.

Are you lazy only to yourself, or with everything and to others?
Do you work? If so, what area and do you enjoy it?
What turns you on?
What turns you off?
What would you REALLY like to do if money was no object?
What are you good at?
How can you contribute to make the world a better joint?

Come on, hit those keys .. please .. you can see that there are plenty
of good people in this world. Be one of 'em and have some fun at the
same time. You will find that energy and motivation again once you
realise your own value to others and to yourself.

We will be waiting to hear more from you.

Hmmm... you sound similar. Believe it or not similar to my condition..
well, in a way. I am a computer programmer and I think about myself
just the way you do about yourself (the good part :-)).

My suggestion: start distributing your music/ songs for free on web.
Why? Appreciation from strangers motivates you like nothing else. I
create and distribute programs for free (some I sell too). When ppl
send emails that they absolutely love my program, that motivates me to
write more cool programs. If I stop making modifications, the users
start shouting and that motivates me too.

My wife sings and dances. She teaches to dance and probably that's why
she is always on her feet (well, she is quite oppostite of lazy).
Maybe you should take up part time teaching - that might motivate you
too.

Do what you like best. Do not push yourself... that does not work. If
you do not feel like making something, don't do it that very moment.
But try not to miss a moment. If you can, try going out. In my college
time, I remember there was this guy who used to study all dressed up.
I got curiuos one day and asked him why was he always well dressed
with his sneakers on while studying - shouldn't you be in pajamas all
comfy when you want to concentrate? Well, I was wrong. I realized that
immediately after I asked that question. He smiled looking at my face.
So whenever I know I should be doing that, but not feeling like it, I
go take a shower - get dressed - take my laptop and goto bookstore.

Rahul

I don't know if this applies to you, but sometimes people reach a
point in their life where they get 'burnt out' - meaning they have
been so driven and focused on a project or projects... that they end
up spinning their wheels.

I found this quote a long time ago:

"You don't have to push and push and push yourself in order to prove
you can be successful. It will come eventually, and when it finally
does march into your life, you should want to be able to handle it.
What if success finally knocked on your door but you were too tired
and mentally exhausted to be in a condition to take advantage of that
success?

History is full of sad examples of people who started out with a
dream, pursued that dream relentlessly, and used all their talents and
time. Somehow, when they arrived at the end of the rainbow, they were
either too tired, or too bogged down by worries that they were going
to lose it, that they couldn't even enjoy the colors, much less the
contents of that allegorical kettle."

I used to think that I was lazy because I had not achieved many of the
goals to which I aspired. Now that I am older, I see that not sloth,
but timidity, was (and is) my real problem. Often I am so worried
about possibly failing or encountering rejection that I don't even
try. A defeatist attitude is the shortest route to a defeat: you're
beaten before you begin.

I don't have an easy answer. I don't think an easy answer exists.
Problems like this one tend to plague us for a lifetime. Perhaps one
of the main purposes of our lives is to grapple with our own
shortcomings, and eventually gain an accurate (and usually humbling)
view of ourselves.

Your problem seems to be:    You're afraid of failing.  Well, you
proved yourself right.  You did fail.. you'll never be a singer, just
a singer who could have been.  Sorry...

Now take the above and do your demo.  Prove me wrong.  Prove yourself wrong!!

Well just4fun2 - I think I misjudged you. From your first post, I
thought, you didn't know much about me (and yeah, you're right this
was true). But your last post really hurt me. And it touched me. And
you're so damn right. I'd like to accept that as an answer, although
it is no real answer in its native sense. It's a pity that you're no
"professional" here =(. In line with the posts of rjain and ru_me2,
your post will come to the right of my monitor. If I will ever finish
my demo (and I'm on my way to do so), please leave me your contacts at
thanksforyourhelp at trojasonic dot com, as I will send you a signed
one as soon as it's ready. PROMISE. Also thanks to all the others who
took their time to take care. Ah btw if there's another post that
really hits my heart, its author will receive this honour too. And I
still wonder who will finally answer my question... =)

live ye long and prosper,

Amadeus

finally the only answer that I can recommed to you is 
the Anthony Robbins collection " Get the Edge" and other book 
tittled Man search for meaning. 
I went to the same past but now I have completd 80% of my goal 

Let me know

As always, I checked Ambrose Bierce (The Devil?s Dictionary).

Laziness, n. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.

I?m only quoting :-)