My wife has been taking various forms of the contraceptive pill for
about 2 years. At the moment she is taking Femodene, which is a
mid-strength 3rd generation combined pill.

Previously she was on a different contraceptive pill. The common
factor with all of these pills is that whenever she has taken them she
suffers major loss of sexual appetite (only wants sex once or twice a
week rather than every day), in addition to reduced lubrication and
other side effects.

I spoke to my friend who said he had the same problem. Following this
we switched to the current pill, Femodene; and while it was better
than the previous one, it is still a long long way from ideal. Since
she has stopped taking it while we ran out on holiday, she has found
that her sexual appetite has increased a lot.

Understandably we would like to find a contraceptive alternative (that
is available in the UK). Condoms are probably even worse in terms of
sexual pleasure, so this is not worth discussing.

I have found very minimal data about loss of sexual appetite related
to the use of the pill, so I would appreciate it if someone could
identify which of the two hormones in the combined pill causes this,
and whether a switch to the mini-pill, which uses only oestrogen(?),
would be any better. Essentially, if I can find that there is
something in the combined pill that causes the loss of libido, and the
mini-pill does not have this problem I will be satisfied.

If this is not the case, I would appreciate some data on practical
(from a convenience point of view) contraceptive alternatives for us
as a married couple. Examples: if it can be shown that hormonal
contraceptives will all have negative effects on my wife, some real
data on the dangers (percentage risks) of IUDs, the ease of use of
things like the rhythm method (for instance using the machine that is
supposed to give you a green or red to tell you whether you can get
pregnant), or perhaps some anecdotal discussion of people that use
removable contraceptive methods such as the sponge, and how easy they
find the application.

So in summary my primary concern is whether we can find a hormonal
contraceptive method that will not affect libido, and if not, some
discussion about a suitable alternative.

Thanks

PS. My wife already has an appointment to see the doctor in about 20
hours time, so I would appreciate a quick response.

While the main topic: "influences of hormonal contraceptives on
libido" is certainly interesting, a few remarks worried me a bit:
-"Condoms are probably even worse in terms of sexual pleasure, so this
is not worth discussing"
-"she suffers major loss of sexual appetite (only wants sex once or twice a
week rather than every day)"
-"My wife already has an appointment to see the doctor in about 20
hours time, so I would appreciate a quick response"

I think going to the doctor is a great idea, and I hope you will
survive the next 20 hours without sex ;) You will have just enough
time to think about:
- how you might have sexual pleasure 'even' with a condom;
- if it's your wife's problem as much as it is yours;
- whether there are other factors than being out of pills that make
your wife and you feel better while on holidays.

Good luck! :)

It's always amusing to see the responses to these types of questions
whereby the responder implies that the poster is only interested in
himself, and I can't resist responding. However I should probably
respond. I personally didn't use to mind using a condom, but my wife
was very particular that she didn't like them... After 2 years of
non-use; however, I can't say I am terribly keen either.

The question of whether or not it is my problem or hers is somewhat
strange, she has certainly indicated that she has reduced sexual
pleasure, so unless you believe that a woman's role in sex is purely a
chore to please her husband, I can't see how you can imply that
reduced libido is somehow *my* problem rather than hers.

Finally, the attempt at amateur psychology in implying that the fact
of being on holiday might be the cause of the increased interest in
sex rather than the pill, is cute but not particularly helpful, as
over the last 2 1/2 years since the birth of our son we have noticed
dramatically reduced libido when taking the pill, which, we have
observed on probably 3 or 4 occasions, improves within a week of
cessation of the contraceptive, making it plain what the cause of it
is. So it is not a question of a coincidence, but a very obvious
effect, which also possibly (but less easily observable) affects her
mood as well.

Anyway to clarify, we are interested in anything *but* condoms, as was
indicated....

PS. Who said anything about not having sex for the next 20 hours. ;-)

and I'm not sure why the fact that she is going to see the doctor in
20 hours should be worrying. If I can find information that suggests
that she should ask the doctor for a different form of pill or
alternatively even a different kind of contraception, obviously she
should have that before rather than after visiting the doctor....

This is pure speculation, but maybe she wants a child and having sex
with the possibility of getting pregnant is exciting for her?  Maybe
it has nothing to do with the pill at all.  I understand that doesn't
solve your problem, but it is a possibility. (she may not be aware of
it.)  I hope the visit to the Dr. helps and that you both enjoy your
sex life.