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Q: Grammar errors in this paragraph ( Answered 5 out of 5 stars,   5 Comments )
Question  
Subject: Grammar errors in this paragraph
Category: Arts and Entertainment > Books and Literature
Asked by: jackdurden-ga
List Price: $3.00
Posted: 15 Oct 2004 10:07 PDT
Expires: 14 Nov 2004 09:07 PST
Question ID: 415336
Methods to Avoid a Speeding Ticket
Chances are that you will or have gotten a speeding ticket, maybe you
were late to work or school, maybe you didn?t see the speed limit
sign, whatever the case there are a couple ways to avoid a traffic
ticket; don?t drive a vehicle that stands out, and change the way you
drive and interact with the officer. One way to avoid a speeding
ticket is to drive a non-flashy car. A speeding red sports car with
neon lights is more likely to be noticed then a black Toyota that
blends in to the rest of the traffic. Make sure all your lights work,
a broken tail light or turning signal will be noticed and make your
car stand out. Do not have stickers on your car, such as ?Don?t pull
me over, I don?t have donuts,? as that will most likely offend the
officer and cause a dent in your wallet.  If your automobile can?t
blend in, then you can still avoid a ticket by changing the way you
drive. Speeding in the fast lane is sure to get you pulled over; you
are better off in the slow lane as most police target the other lanes.
Follow truck drivers, they know where most of the speed traps are and
are good at spotting them a mile away. If you drive next to someone
that is speeding you can lower the chance of getting pulled over by
fifty percent, unless the officer radios another trooper down to road
to pull you over too. If you do get pulled over it is not over yet,
you can still try to plead your way out of the ticket. Always be
polite to the officer, never ask to see the radar gun (they can make
it say whatever they want), and don?t argue with the officer.  Crying
might work, let those tears roll and the police officer might have
sympathy on you and let you go. If all else fails just let the officer
know that you can?t afford the ticket and you might be let off with a
warning or at least a lower fine. Chances are that if you keep getting
pulled over you will eventually get a ticket, and the best method to
prevent a speeding ticket is to stop speeding, but for the lead foots
that are always late it?s good to know that there are a couple ways to
even the odds.



Need a corrected paragraph in 30mins...you will get 5 stars and a tip.
Answer  
Subject: Re: Grammar errors in this paragraph
Answered By: emjay-ga on 15 Oct 2004 10:26 PDT
Rated:5 out of 5 stars
 
Hello jackdurden,

I've corrected the selection as per your request, tweaking
grammar/spelling as necessary and making several small stylistic
changes. The text follows.


Methods to Avoid a Speeding Ticket

Chances are that you will or have gotten a speeding ticket. Maybe you
were late for work or school; maybe you didn?t see the speed limit
sign. Whatever the case, there are several steps you can take to help
avoid a traffic ticket.

One way to avoid a speeding ticket is to drive a non-flashy car. A
speeding red sports car with neon lights is more likely to be noticed
than a black Toyota that blends in with the rest of the traffic. Make
sure all your lights work;
a broken tail light or turning signal will be noticed and make your
car stand out. Do not place stickers on your car with slogans like ?Don?t pull
me over, I don?t have donuts" -- this will most likely offend the
officer and put a dent in your wallet.  

If your automobile doesn't blend in, you can still avoid a ticket by
changing how you drive. Speeding in the fast lane is sure to get you
pulled over; you
are better off driving in the slow lane as most police target the other lanes.
Another tip is to follow truck drivers, who know where most of the
speed traps are and can spot them a mile away. Finally, if you drive
next to someone
who is speeding you may lower the chance of getting pulled over by
fifty percent, unless the officer radios another trooper down the road
to pull you over too. 

If you do get pulled over, there's still hope. You can always try to
plead your way out of the ticket. Always be polite to the officer,
never ask to see the radar gun (they can make it display whatever they
want), and don?t argue with the officer. Crying might work -- let
those tears roll and the police officer might have sympathy for you
and let you go. If all else fails, just let the officer know that you
can?t afford the ticket; you might be let off with a
warning or at least a lower fine. Chances are that if you get pulled
over repeatedly you will eventually get a ticket, so the best method
to
prevent a speeding ticket is to stop speeding. However, for the
perpetually late lead-footed types it?s good to know that there are
some ways to help even the odds.

Source:
Personal knowledge (writer/underemployed English degree-holder :))

Please don't hesitate to post questions/clarification requests!

Regards,
Emjay-ga

Request for Answer Clarification by jackdurden-ga on 15 Oct 2004 10:36 PDT
Hi, thanks for the answer...I was just wondering if could you think of
a shorter introduction to the paragaraph?


Also what is your opnion of the paragaraph? any tips?

thanks.

Clarification of Answer by emjay-ga on 15 Oct 2004 11:37 PDT
Good point, pinkfeud! I agree - it should be changed. I like your
suggestion but find the parentheses interrupt the flow a bit - perhaps
the following would be a more succinct introduction:

"Chances are that you've received a speeding ticket or will be faced
with one at some point in your life."

jackdurden, I hope you find this a less clumsy introduction to the
paragraph than the original.

No specific tips come to mind - the flow of the piece was pretty good
to begin with, so I didn't need to do a major overhaul. Just watch the
commas! :) I had to break up a couple of run-on sentences by replacing
commas with semicolons or periods. I must compliment you, though, on
your generally appropriate use of the oft-misused semicolon.

tutuzdad makes a good point regarding the credibility of the info - I
don't have  the knowledge to comment on the issue, and don't know if
the material is intended to be presented as fact, but hopefully
tutuzdad can give you some insight on the workings of law enforcement!

Emjay-ga
jackdurden-ga rated this answer:5 out of 5 stars and gave an additional tip of: $1.00
THANK YOU SO MUCH! A+++ WORK! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK

Comments  
Subject: Re: Grammar errors in this paragraph
From: emjay-ga on 15 Oct 2004 10:28 PDT
 
Sorry for the odd line breaks that appeared in a couple spots -
formatting issues! :)
Emjay
Subject: Re: Grammar errors in this paragraph
From: tutuzdad-ga on 15 Oct 2004 10:39 PDT
 
Nice job by the researcher but as a lifelong law enforcement
professional myself I can tell you that your grammatical errors pale
in comparision to the FACTUAL errors. Much of what was in the sample
paragraphs is simply untrue if not outrageous.

Regards;
tutuzdad-ga
Subject: Re: Grammar errors in this paragraph
From: jackdurden-ga on 15 Oct 2004 10:42 PDT
 
To  tutuzdad: could you let me know what is outrageous?
Subject: Re: Grammar errors in this paragraph
From: tutuzdad-ga on 15 Oct 2004 10:57 PDT
 
I'd be happy to. If you'd like to post a seperate question for me I'd
gladly make an effort to point out the parts that are inconsistent
with what I know to be true.

tutuzdad-ga
Subject: Re: Grammar errors in this paragraph
From: pinkfreud-ga on 15 Oct 2004 11:00 PDT
 
Excellent work, emjay!

I have one quibble. This sentence seems off to me:

"Chances are that you will or have gotten a speeding ticket."

You'd never say "chances are that you will gotten..."

I think this is better:

"Chances are that you will get (or have gotten) a speeding ticket."

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