Google Answers Logo
View Question
Q: alanis ( Answered 5 out of 5 stars,   4 Comments )
Subject: alanis
Category: Relationships and Society > Romance
Asked by: jellyware-ga
List Price: $50.00
Posted: 01 Nov 2004 16:22 PST
Expires: 01 Dec 2004 16:22 PST
Question ID: 423153
will I ever meet the girl of my dreams?

Request for Question Clarification by pinkfreud-ga on 01 Nov 2004 17:14 PST
There are many Google Answers Researchers who give advice on
relationships, but we'll need to know more about you in order to be of
much help. If you can tell us a bit about yourself (not your name or
contact info, of course), I'm sure someone will be interested in
discussing the subject of how to find the girl of your dreams -- or
how to modify your expectations and find the kind of girl you can
reasonably expect to get! ;-)
Subject: Re: alanis
Answered By: leapinglizard-ga on 01 Nov 2004 22:03 PST
Rated:5 out of 5 stars
Dear jellyware,

If Alanis Morissette is the girl of your dreams, it is unlikely that
you will ever meet her in a romantic setting. It is not out of the
question that you will spot her crossing a red carpet or passing through
the back entrance of a theater, and you may even win backstage passes
to a concert of hers if you manage to be the 97th caller to a radio
station. As enjoyable as these encounters may be to you, they will be
fleeting and fundamentally impersonal. When Alanis greets her admirers,
she is not seeking a new mate. In the first place, she already has one
-- she is currently engaged to longtime paramour Ryan Reynolds -- and
in any event, she is justifiably leery of strangers who seek from her
something more than a chaste smile and a kind word.

You must try to empathize with her lofty but beleaguered social
station. As a famous, wealthy, and talented individual, she is beset
from all quarters, at all times, by those who would exploit her in some
way. Entertainment reporters need a picture, a money quote, or a tidbit of
gossip. Managers and financial planners want a cut of her action. Fellow
artists want to collaborate with her or compete against her. The main
preoccupation of Alanis Morissette, apart from seeking the muse and
making music, is fending off the unwanted attentions of the public at
large. By necessity, she chooses her own circle of friends. They do not,
by and large, choose her.

Unless you are a member of the jet set, a big cheese in the music
business, or a servant in a Hollywood household, you are unlikely to come
across Alanis Morissette at all. Even if you do, your unequal footing
will make it impossible for her to trust you fully. This is not to say
that you are not a good man, not at all, but it is well established that a
celebrity feels truly at home only in the company of other celebrities. It
is a very peculiar thing, perhaps beyond human comprehension, to be so
famous and to have so much money. That is why celebrities hang out with
celebrities, fall in love with celebrities, and marry celebrities.

Even if you were, like Alanis Morissette, a wealthy and prolific musical
genius, it is unlikely that she would turn out to be the ideal companion
of your dreams. As a plebeian, your position is even weaker. This is
because the wish to find the ideal girl is not only unrealistic but
mildly immoral. If you truly believe that there is a starry creature
waiting in the firmament, and that one dark night she will crash through
the atmosphere and fall smoking at your feet, then you harbor a selfish
ambition. You are either seeking to acquire a woman in the way you would
a motorcycle or a mounted salmon, or you are hoping that there is someone
who will tend to your every need in addition to being a charming and
decorative appurtenance.

Please don't think that I accuse you of malice. The belief that there is
a perfect man or woman with whom one can enter into an effortless union
is popular in the affluent West despite its transparent falsehood. You,
in fact, by selecting as an object of your ideation an unapproachable
celebrity rather than a person in your social circle, are expending
your selfish romantic energies in a futile direction, like emptying a
revolver into the air. This speaks to a certain moral fortitude even
while you are in the grip of a fallacy.

The proper question to ask is not whether there is an ideal girl for you,
but whether you are an ideal boy for someone. If instead of seeking the
perfect lover you seek to be the perfect lover, you will immediately make
yourself more appealing to the eligible members of your entourage. There
is no quality more attractive in a prospective mate than the ability
and willingness to bring something to the table, to give more thought
to the other than to oneself. What makes girls recoil is the grasping,
fawning, or lustful approach of one who thinks he has found an angelic
creature to light up his days.

You would do best to forget about Alanis Morissette, and ignore even 
the possibility that the ideal creature lives down the hall from you
or works on the tenth floor in Accounting. To make yourself desirable
to honest girls, interesting women, and, yes, even sultry Canadian
singers, you must concentrate on improving yourself. You should be the
ideal. Make yourself honest, make yourself interesting, and make yourself
sultry. Take singing lessons, too. What you get out of a romance is not,
for the most part, a function of what the other has to offer, but of
what you put into it. Note this well.

If you feel that any part of my answer deserves amendment or
amplification, do let me know through a Clarification Request so that
I have a chance to fully meet your needs before you assign a rating.


jellyware-ga rated this answer:5 out of 5 stars
I'm a 29 yr old sydney guy.  I think my credit card has just been
maxed so I can't keep paying you guys for answers.  but I'm nice.  I
like to dress casually.  I like radiohead and the eels.  I also like
fun times with close friends.  I'm a little overweight but I have
discovered its the combination of fat and sugar in my diet that causes
me to stay cuddly.  I have been drinking lots of water, eating a more
balanced diet and doing exercise.  tell me more about you miss freud. 
what do you think of kant?

Subject: Re: alanis
From: leapinglizard-ga on 02 Nov 2004 21:51 PST
Thank you for the rating, jellyware. I see you have taken up
membership in the pinkfreud admirers' association. I know nothing
about her personally, nor do I wish to make inquiries, but her moral
and intellectual strengths are manifest in her online actions.

Subject: Re: alanis
From: jellyware-ga on 06 Nov 2004 17:41 PST
you wonderful women ever read the latest books by germaine greer?  I'd
be interested in what you think.
Subject: Re: alanis
From: leapinglizard-ga on 06 Nov 2004 19:54 PST
I am not a woman. I have not read anything by Germaine Greer.

Subject: Re: alanis
From: jellyware-ga on 07 Nov 2004 15:37 PST
you are not a woman?  I am a man.  A man looking for an intelligent,
emotional, sultry, sexy, rich and famous singer to share some honest,
open and interesting conversation with.

Important Disclaimer: Answers and comments provided on Google Answers are general information, and are not intended to substitute for informed professional medical, psychiatric, psychological, tax, legal, investment, accounting, or other professional advice. Google does not endorse, and expressly disclaims liability for any product, manufacturer, distributor, service or service provider mentioned or any opinion expressed in answers or comments. Please read carefully the Google Answers Terms of Service.

If you feel that you have found inappropriate content, please let us know by emailing us at with the question ID listed above. Thank you.
Search Google Answers for
Google Answers  

Google Home - Answers FAQ - Terms of Service - Privacy Policy