I'm working on a project where we have to retrive information from an
ancient and arcane Unix-based dial up accessible machine.  I need a
piece of software (either for Linux or Windows) that will allow me to
do the following things: start the program directly into a script that
will dial a specific phone number and press recorded keystrokes,
capture text from the session, disconnect from the server, and exit
cleanly.

I assume you have looked at minicom and have rejected it.

This sounds more like a good course in BASH scripting would help,
since your task does not sound especially complex.

By the way, also register on www.justlinux.com and ask the question
there. If they don't believe it's homework (they hate it when the
lazies try to get the assembled experts to do their homework) you
might get a quick answer.

Free sniffer program Ethereal will sniff dial-up as well as Network. 
Linux versions available.

Theoretically, a BASH script could do it, but I'm not an experienced
BASH script programmer, and I'm not sure I could deal with the odd
terminal emulations I'm dealing with here (TVI9xx and VT-100 with
ncursors screens), so I figured a term program already set up to do
this might be the best option.