Ok, Im a Christian gay guy how moved to New York city on Oct 12th last
year. I was living in TN with my Christian family who doesn't know I'm
gay. I had a good job there but I was unhappy. I finally got tired
hiding my sexual preferences and I quit my job, sold my car and found
a room in NYC all in one day. It was all perfect. I moved to the city
and I went out to look for a job many, many times and had no luck. I'm
a graphic designer. There's a lot of competition in this area in NYC,
and I have no contacts. Finally reality hit me and I accepted the fact
that I have to go back to TN because I can no longer afford to pay
rent. Everything is packed because I leave on monday. My mother
already bought me a car in TN and my family and Christian friends are
very happy Im going back. Tomorrow I have a job interview for a great
position as the main graphic designer for one of the nicest and most
popular restaurants in New York City. I know there's a big chance I
get the job since they're looking for somebody who specializes in my
area and I've been doing this for 12 years.
ok, the question is... in case I get the job, should I stay and
finally start from zero? I have no more money for rent, and I could
probably ask some friends to give me a roof while I make some money,
or... should I go back home to TN where things will be much easier but
I'll have to go back and live the Straight lifestyle I got rid of by
coming to New York?  I'm so confused!

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Clarification of Question by pixelman-ga on 29 Jan 2005 08:37 PST

First of all I'd like to thank everybody for your time and advice. I
just found out about GA and I'm thrilled I decided to post this
question. I went to the interview yesterday, and after viewing my
resume and trying my computer skills, they offered me the position.
However, the salary was far from enough to make it here in New York.
Not only they wanted me to work 40 hours a week, but also overtime
without pay(since it's salary based) I think they're looking for
someone who takes the job more as a hobby rather than a way to make a
living. My stuff is packed and my ticket is bought. As much as I know
I'll regret going back, I also know that right now I have no other
option. I'm completely out of money. I'll try to make the best of this
experience and I'll enjoy seeing everybody back home. It's not the end
of the world, and Im young and can try again in the future.
Thanks again for your advice. 
Marco.

New York, New York!

Man, if you can make it there you can make it anywhere.

Go home to Tennessee and you'll regret it for the rest of your life.

Good luck!

pixelman,

Stay in New York.  I reiterate what probono said:  ..."Go home to
Tennessee and you'll regret it for the rest of your life..."

CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY, and the means to that end will follow.  Ya just
gotta believe.  You must believe there is no other option.  Totally
focus on the goal of becoming self-supporting in New York.

I also think you should be prepared to learn you may not be told you
are hired --tomorrow.  In a position such as you are applying for,
it's common for there to be many interviewees, where a few are
selected for another interview.  You may not find you have made it to
round 2 until a week from now.  At the least, you will not find out
for a day or 2 after the interview, at the earliest.

In the meantime, do WHATEVER it takes to stay in New York.  Keep
putting out resumes, calling etc.  Borrow money, go do some casual
labor if you have to.  Pass out flyers in a nice neighborhood for
computer repair, or whatever you can do immediately in regards to
computers.  Businesses commonly have slow running computers that are
easy to speed up..

Going back would be a huge setback for you.  New York is your future,
it will work if you want it bad enough.  It's not going to be easy,
just keep you mind focused on the prize:  a new life.

Good luck, --and please return and update every so often so we know
what happens to you..

~~Cynthia

I join the choir. Stay in NYC.

New York?

Stay in New York.  You will be miserable in Tenn.  Visit for the
holidays, but don't go back for good.  Best of lucj with your
interview.

--Nelson
lives in Brooklyn
works in Manhattan

You'd always wonder, and you can always move back. Best of luck.

New York.

Best of luck in Tennessee.  Y'all come back now, ya'hear.

And next time maybe try San Francisco.

Stay in New York.  If you go back you'll never take a chance in your
life again.  Tennessee if the safe choice but you'll be unhappy,
you'll get some "I told you so's", and besides you can move back to
Tennessee anytime.  If your family and friends love you they will
accept the fact that you have to live your dream and they should be
accepting if you come back home.

Marco,

GOOD LUCK TO YOU, and may you find the happiness you are seeking...

~~Cynthia

pixelman-ga 
You said you are a Christian. What is God telling you. Do you think
you will get to know God better here or in TN? The friends awaiting
you, are they genuine friends? Is it good to continue being untruthful
to God and your friends? God will direct you. Eternity is sweet -
choose you this day whom you shall serve.
CM