I found out some disturbing news over the weekend about my 18 Year Old
Sister. She is a senior in high school and will be graduating in a
I was visiting my grandparents who live about 2 hours away (The same
town as my Mom and Sister). I am very close to my family and visit a
couple times a month. My grandmother got a call from my sister that
upset her. My sister had sounded very weird and hung up on my
grandmother for no apparent reason. She then called back 2 more times
and was incoherent and again hung up without saying goodbye.
We decided it was best that my wife and I went to pay her a visit (my
sister and wife are also very close). When we got there, she was
laying on the couch with a blanket over her head. We attempted to
talk to her several times, but she was unresponsive (starring off into
the distance). Finally, after talking for nearly a half hour, she
seemed to snap out of her state and started talking with us, but was
talking rapidly in broken sentences and seemed very confused why all
of this was happening. We finally got it out of her that the problem
she was having was that she "wanted to do nothing with her life and
she wanted everyone to accept that". She didn't want to get a job,
she didn't want to go to college (even though all her life she wanted
to be a doctor and had the grades to do that), she didn't want to do
ANYTHING. She also said she was happy doing nothing and she couldn't
understand why others were sad about her decisions. She seemed to
show signs of paranoia as she said she thought the police has told
every one of her teachers that she is on Meth. She also had a few
other family and friend problems, but not important to this question.
Besides the incoherent speech, we were thinking these problems were a
result of her being at that age of "Not a girl, not yet a woman". She
seemed very relieved to be talking to sympathetic ears and we had
gained her full confidence. Then, she lowered the bomb... She has
been taking Crystal Meth.
Then, it all seemed clear what her main problem was and things started
fitting together. Like about a month ago, my mom had said she was
very sick and slept for 2 straight days. She had lost a noticeable
amount of weight (not a lot, but enough to notice). Her skin was
pale. And, her "Do Nothing" attitude came about.
That was Saturday... It is now Tuesday and it has been on my mind
every second since she told me this. My wife seems to think it is
just a phase that teenagers go through, but I refuse to do nothing.
The problem is... I have no idea what to do.
So, I have turned to the almighty resource of the internet for some
guidance. I now know every slang term for the drug... I know every
symptom that comes with the drug... I know how to spot drug abuse
with your teen... I know how to help the children of parents who are
taking it... I have followed it path from WWII to California and its
eastward spread... I know everything about the drug except how to help
a teenager that is taking it.
I do not know how long she has been taking it (for at least a month,
but I suspect more).
I do not know how much she takes.
I do know which of her friends that take it with her.
I know it has not taken over her life 100% (She did want to do
something for our mom on Mother's Day).
I have not discussed this issue with her yet - I just let her tell me
about it and I have not yet gave advise or any other communication on
I am VERY reluctant to share this information with my mother right
now. She is a terrible communicator and I feel she will push my
sister even further away if she were to confront her. Also, I think I
have built up trust with her on this issue (She called us last night
in the middle of the night crying and talking incoherently). I think
that if she knew I told anyone, she would cut off our communication.
She said she was going to come to my house this week to stay a couple
days. My first plan is to talk to her about it... I really don't
know what to say as I feel that she doesn't think that it is a
So, now to my questions...
What should I say to her?
Should I involve my mother?
What about the option of forcing her to rehab? The reason I ask this
is she is a couple weeks from graduation. Is she still considered a
minor? I know that you cannot force an adult to rehab, so I ask this
because the timing for this is running out quickly.
Should I turn in the name of the person she gets it from, or will that
possibly cause a dangerous situation for her?
Any other information or advise is greatly appreciated!!!!