Hi, Radiant-ruby !
What fun your wedding plans sound, and I do wish you and your fiancé well !
Nenna?s right - you?ve asked for a lot of information and ideas, but
hopefully I can give you some useful pointers.
First your gift list. I can?t begin to guess what you and your fiancé
either need or want. I?m assuming you?re not in need of pop-up
toasters and the like. However, here are some ideas:
the last couple of weddings I?ve been invited to have openly suggested
gifts of money as an alternative gift - one even included a tactful
(silver) envelope in which to place the offering. Personally I find
this embarrassing, but at least it?s practical. Another variation on
this - perhaps more acceptable - is:
- Store Gift Vouchers:
Voucher Express offer Choice vouchers which can be used in a wide
range of stores, as well as store-specific vouchers, at:
Choices own site is:
Their vouchers are in values from 2 to 20 pounds.
Other ideas could be:
-His?n?hers Magazine subscriptions:
Maybe ?Rockabilly Revue? for you
or another from the list at:
?Skratch? or similar for him:
- A limo FROM the airport for when you get back.
- A good digital camera for all those photos of Hawaii.
My personal favourites are the Sony Mavica range because they have
options to save onto floppy disc or CD (depending on model) as well as
memory sticks. This means you don?t have to keep finding a friendly
internet connection to upload your photos. There are some UK price
There are various models.
- Hair stuff.
A gift for the poorer friend to afford which needs more imagination than money.
- For very poor friends - their own art work or music on CD. Just
remember you?ll have to display it or play it.
OK. Next question:
Decorations, wedding favours, cake style, etc. This is really one
query - theme. I?m assuming you don?t want skulls with candles in them
as the main table decoration ? Perhaps not, if you?ve any
unimaginative elderly relatives.
Two ideas here:
- Look at some of the better tattoo sites for images. For example:
There is a free trial membership (no downlaods) and a very affordable
Browse among the artwork for the images you like (swallows, flowers,
Hawaiian themes) in an very clear tattoo style. Use those as the basis
for your decorations - pretty, for the conventional guest; and very
clearly recognizable in artistic style for the punk tattoo fans. Keep
in mind that the image of a swallow in a tattoo seems to symbolise a
lost loved one, so is probably not the best choice of image. Try for
doves ?? There are also plenty of religious symbols in this style, if
that?s appropriate for you.
A bonus is these designs ought to be really good for piping icing on the cake.
And/or to be really silly:
- Use butcher paper as the table topper.
Raid your local discount store and provide each guest with a pack of
decoration odds and ends - a streamer, a couple of balloons, some
coloured bendy straws, anything pretty, in a bag or basket that they
can keep (as their favour).
Get the MC to tell guests they have five (ten?) minutes to co-operate
to decorate their own tables, with a prize (your choice - but wine or
chocolates are good) for the most imaginative.
People of all ages really get into this even when sober, strangers
start to talk to each other, you save money on table settings that are
wrecked as soon as somebody moves a napkin, and the venue doesn?t have
to sweat too much over room themeing. It?s also very economical.
Don?t include anything in the pack that will mark the venue?s carpet
or wallpaper, or that may set light to anything !!
This is where I?d go Hawaiian, otherwise this theme doesn?t really
fit, unless you?re planning a wedding in Hawaii itself. Ask people to
dress Hawaiian. (If there?s a church rehearsal, check what?s
appropriate there with the minister first.)
You might consider flower leis. I doubt if fresh frangipani is
available cheaply in the UK, but Hindu weddings traditionally
incorporate an exchange of garlands, and there?s probably a local
florist that specialises in supplying these, as long as it?s not the
depth of winter. It might be worth the expense for you and your fiancé
Countrywide, talk to:
Or you might want to incorporate that idea into the wedding itself.
- Fiancé ?s Wedding Box - this, I think, is intended to be silly, so
make it silly. But perhaps include one small item he?s always hankered
after: a REAL Swiss Army Knife, a 15mm open-sprocket twiddle-wrench,
- preferably something he wants, and you can?t imagine why he wants
- Romantic things to do in Hawaii:
Apart from holing up in a good hotel and - er - watching cable TV??
Remember what you?re really doing here is building the first shared
experiences of your married life. It?s not really about candle-light
I have no idea how long you?ve given yourselves but here are some
basic ideas from my one and only visit:
Eat waffles with bacon and maple syrup for breakfast.
Take the trolley (tram) tour of the city. Visit the Royal Palace. The
Maritime Museum is also excellent. (Depends on your definition of
Do the round island trip by bus or taxi.
If you can afford it, do the trip that flies you over the volcano/es.
Collect all those discount restaurant vouchers people will push at you
and pick some good places to eat, cheap.
Look for the guy with macaws who takes photos of you with the beautiful birds.
Visit the bird park.
Walk on Waikiki beach at sunset. This is a tourist beach in a city,
not an isolated beach, so it?s not that exciting, but it?s a good
beach, and they?re good sunsets.
Get a local paper (or search the Internet) for music gigs.
The kind of ring that will suit you both will depend on such things as
the size and shape of your hands, and so on. Do take the jeweler?s
advice. But if you want to go with theme ideas, may I suggest a twin
ring structure : a plain band, possibly shaped, which interlocks with
another band which incorporates your theme image - skull, flower,
whatever, as is often done with gemstones.
Otherwise might I suggest the bird theme - swallow and/or eagle - with
the wings spread around the band and the head modeled where the
gemstone would normally be set. This would need a jewellery designer,
not your average shop.
Is your DJ using vinyl or CDs ? Does he record his own mixes ? If
s/he?s a friend doing you a favour then probably you will do best to
leave them to it and settle for what you?re given.
From my son?s experience as a professional DJ, songlists provided by
the host are constantly over-ridden by guest requests on the day, so
unless you intend to lock your DJ into an inaccessible box it?s not
going to work. Give her/him a clear idea of what you prefer, and if
Aunt Alice requests and gets the Beatles Remastered, never mind.
Your own choice of music should happen:
1. When you arrive at the venue.
2. At the equivalent of the Bridal Waltz.
3.When you leave, if you choose to do the big official exit.
Remember, it?s your wedding; if you want it to be fun and a little
unconventional, just make that very clear on the invitations, and to
any immediate relatives who are inclined to argue - especially if they
are paying for the wedding. Talk to your minister or celebrant or
whomever as to what they find appropriate. Explain gently and
personally to any elderly relatives attending who might be confused
(though they might surprise you with raunchy reminiscences of 1932).
No-one else matters.
Thank you for your question - I?ve enjoyed working on it.
UK ?gift vouchers?
UK rockabilly magazine
UK punk magazine
UK Hindu ?wedding garlands?
Clarification of Answer by
12 Aug 2005 02:03 PDT
Hi, again, Radiant-Ruby !
I?m sorry I did not focus my answer as you required. You asked for ten
different aspects of your plans to be addressed, and it wasn?t clear
which ones had top priority.
Here, however are a couple more romantic Hawaii ideas, and some
information on the local music scene.
- Romantic Hawaii:
There are a couple of very special possibilities. Aloha Destinations are at:
?Private sunset dinner on the beach
First Class Romance
Table set with fine linen, china, silverware
Choice of 3 menus
Your own chef and server
All dinners include salad, appetizers, entree & dessert
Premium beverages available at an additional charge.
Photos taken by staff
And handed to you at the end of the evening
$350.00 per couple?
or $850.00 with 2 hours limo hire, red carpet and live music.
Several companies offer this service at various prices. Watch out for
whether tax and tips are included or additional:
Some hotels and other venues will also arrange beach dinners - I would
wait until I got there to book, unless it?s a very short stay. You?ll
probably get better prices on the spot.
You could also consider a Hawaiian style wedding service to renew your vows:
This one is US$ 1670.00 plus tax but they vary depending on inclusions
and extras, and you would not need to bother with the legal
requirements since you?d already be legally married.
If you haven?t already booked, there are lots of romantic
accommodation ideas to be found at:
?How about a remote oceanfront cottage with your own kitchen on Kauai?
Is your dream a first class hotel on the bustling Waikiki Beach, with
all the shopping and nightlife of Honolulu at your fingertips? You can
stay in a first class resort on the Big Island's Kohala Coast, or in
your own private beach bungalow on the charming island of Molokai.
Perhaps you would prefer a restored plantation-era cottage by the sea
on the romantic isle of Kauai. These are only some of the fantastic
honeymoon itineraries Preview Hawaii can help you plan.?
- Linking Hawaii and Punk:
Had you thought of downloading and playing a video such as ?Punk and
Disorderly? in the background of the reception - it?s a surfing and
music video available from:
Perhaps patch it through to a display screen - a lot of venues have
this facility nowadays.
- Hawaii, Rockabilly and Punk:
I suggest adding to your playlist a few artists that are Hawaii based
or have links to Hawaii, so that you are pulling the various ideas
together for the guests.
Gail Lloyd, of Gail & The Tricksters, is one Rockabilly artist you are
probably familiar with. Find her at:
Gail was born in Hawaii and knows how to hula - there?s a nice cartoon
of her in Aloha shirt retro pedal pushers and lei - though she is not
now based in the state.
Suspicious Minds seems to be Hawaii?s first and only rockabilly band
?complete with stand-up bass.? They feature on the Roots Rock Reggae:
Hawaiian Islands album, available from:
Suspicious Minds? website is at:
and it has details of up-coming gigs (out of date), plus free mp3s to download.
Punk is much easier to find, there was a strong eighties punk scene.
An on-line tribute to the 70s and 80s Hawaii punk scene is at:
Again, there are tracks to download.
Current scene is at:
Other bands include the Quintessentials (used to be the Products) at:
and Red Light Taxi with free music downloads at:
Check the conditions of the downloads for copyright restrictions -
they are very stringent in the UK. See notes below. And yes, people
have been fined for breaching the rules, including singing ?Happy
Birthday? (which is copyright) in a public place....!
When in Hawaii look out for what?s on at such venues as The Wave,
Waikiki, the Pipeline Café, Pink Cadillac and Kainoa's Sports Bar.
When looking at gig lists, remember the month is given first in
America - 9.4.05. is the 4th of September.
Have fun !
Additional search terms:
UK ?performing rights association?
- Other comments on music and copyright.
You are probably aware of the new legislation coming in in November
making the already difficult regulations about playing music in public
places even more difficult.
This is partly why it is so difficult to advise you on playlist.
Basically, if your wedding is at home or in a private house, then you
can probably play any music you legally own.
If the venue is not a private home, then the venue will need a
Performing Rights Society licence, and most venues will have this. But
this licence basically covers royalty free music only. Where music is
not royalty free - which is most of it - an additional royalty is
supposed to be paid. Bemuso explains this in part at:
This is why a professional DJ will have a playlist to show you from
which you choose the music. All that business of licensing and
royalties should have been sorted out in advance.
Likewise cover artists are supposed to pay a fee for a licence to
record and distribute their music.
Also if you are videoing the wedding when music is playing in the
background, you need a Wedding Video-Recording Licence !!! If you are
employing a professional videographer this is probably included in the
price, but do check. This is explained at: