My ex gave, of his own free will, alimony to me during our divorce (he
led a double life the entire length of our marriage) the alimony is to
last 7 years, of which he's paid 1 yr. But now that he has someone new
in his life he's seen a lawyer about either reducing or stopping the
alimony payments BUT says he's not going to change anything for the
next 3 years... (I feel that is a lie).
I am moving back to my hometown in another state and am in the middle
of purchasing a house... I've sent several messages to my ex, both
online and cell messages stating that I have an idea that will save
him $$$$$$ on the alimony.
I didn't state exactly what the idea was as I wanted to hash out the
specifics with him in a conversation rather than a message or through
IMs - the idea is a cash settlement that would save him half of what
he'd pay if we kept it as-is. (I would do this only because he's not
really emotionally stable and I do not foresee him having the ability
to continue the payments possibly and as well he's from the UK and
could easily go back at any time, so I figure cashing out now while I
can is the best option for me - its less money but its better than
waiting on him to crash and burn and be left with a lot less).
Thing is... he keeps putting me off about talking about the
alimony money. He says he'll call to discuss my idea, then doesn't --
he's just putting me off - HELLO - I don't know any man paying
alimony who's too busy to listen to his ex wife when she wants to talk
to him about HIM saving money on alimony, do you?
I think he's got something up his sleeve - there's a reason he's not
getting back to me and I wonder is that because if I move out of state
he doesn't have to continue paying the alimony? Or there's a loop hole
somewhere somehow??
My mortgage is dependant upon the alimony, the alimony is part of my
stated income. I am sure the mortgage will indeed go through, closing
is only a week and a half away but if he does something to end or
greatly reduce the alimony now, I will be forced into bankruptcy.
He has sent all of the necessary alimony documents to my lender so he
knows I am depending on the alimony and using it as income to obtain
the mortgage.
He's a sneaky and very underhanded ^%$*$**!!@# and I can just feel
that he's up to something or he would have wanted to know how to save
on the alimony, he's waiting and putting me off for a reason.
Please advise!! |
Clarification of Question by
donein-ga
on
15 Aug 2005 18:49 PDT
Also... is this statement true for the state of Georgia?
?If alimony is agreed to in the property settlement agreement and the
agreement is incorporated into the final decree, then the court
doesn't have the power to change it. But if the court sets
the amount of alimony, it maintains complete control as to whether it
can be raised, lowered, or halted."
|
Request for Question Clarification by
tutuzdad-ga
on
16 Aug 2005 07:27 PDT
The quote you offered is a quote from a web page (not a law book)
about alimony laws IN THE STATE OF VIRGINIA. It does not necessarily
reflect the laws anywhere else.
DIVORCELAWINFO.COM
http://www.divorcelawinfo.com/VA/chsupport/alim2.html
Typically ANY decree that is ordered by the court is binding unless
the court formally reverses or ammends its decision. Therefore,
divorce decrees are binding court orders and the parities have a legal
obligation to abide by them down to the most minute detail as long as
they are in effect. Your move from one location to another should have
no impact on your ex's legal responsiblity to do as the court has
lawfully odered him to do, even if he was in agreement with those
terms at the time the decree was entered. The bottom line is that once
ordered by the court, a person cannot simply change their mind.
Does this answer your question?
tutuzdad-ga
|
Clarification of Question by
donein-ga
on
16 Aug 2005 08:36 PDT
Sorry Steph53 for your loss but don't be bitter with me, I too have
lost a great deal because of this man and if you had read the very
first line in my question that should have given you a huge amount of
insight into why my ex AGREED to pay alimony.
My ex misled me the entire length of our marriage which was really
only a smoke screen, for all outward appearences he had a great job, a
nice wife, a lovely home... but as the saying goes "no one knows what
lurks in the hearts of men".
When the truth came out, he had, for a moment, a conscious. Now that
he has someone new in his life - he no longer wants to pay the
alimony, which doesn't surprise me... you know what they say, once a
lying cheat....
|
Request for Question Clarification by
tutuzdad-ga
on
16 Aug 2005 08:50 PDT
>>>>tutuzdad-ga Sort of.
BUT... is it correct that he can go back to court and have the
payments either stopped or reduced EVEN though the court didn't set
the alimony - that text from the web did sound quite logical, how can
the court reverse or change something that they did not set?
Donein - first of all, please post your responses here for simplicity
sake. Teh comments below are not from researchers but from visitors
who wander in.
Now, as for how the court can change something that it did not set,
it's simple - the court DID set the order when it published the
decree. What if your ex decided he did not want to be divorced from
you? Do you think this could be set aside simply because he changed
his mind? No, because he AGREED to it and the court declared it so in
a lawful order. The fact that your ex no longer wants to abide by a
court order does not absolve him of liability simply because he helped
negotiate it. What's done is done and now he must walk the line.
Can he go back to court and ask the court to reduce alimoney? Sure,
anyone can do that.
Will the court do it? Who knows. It depends on how he presents his
case and what his reasons are.
Can he just stop paying? Yes, people do that all the time.
Will he go to jail if he stops paying? That depends on how furiously
you pursue the matter in court and how this particular court views
contempt of court(sometimes called "failure to comply" charges). What
IS clear is that you can sue him if he stops paying as long as there
is a court order that says he must continue to pay - period.
Is that a better explanation?
tutuzdad-ga
|
Clarification of Question by
donein-ga
on
16 Aug 2005 08:57 PDT
Yes tut. And at the end of the day I suppose whatever will be will be anyway.
As for replying in the wrong place, I'm a newbie.
|
Request for Question Clarification by
tutuzdad-ga
on
16 Aug 2005 08:59 PDT
If you are satisfied may we close the question and call it a day?
tutuzdad-ga
|
Clarification of Question by
donein-ga
on
16 Aug 2005 09:14 PDT
Sure, how do I do it ahaha
|
If you have a court orer that states child support, spousal support
and medical coverage is to be paid, then the only way to stop this
income is for you go back to court and do an upward or downward
modification.
You both would have to complete the child support guidelines to
determine if there's a need for monetary change.
If he stops paying spousal support, then he's screwing himself,
because his spousal support debt keeps accuring with interest until
you guys go back to court and then usually if the courts make a
change, it's effective the date you go back to court. For example:
Divorce date January 2002 Begin Spousal support of 500.00 a month for
7 years beginning June 15, 2002 through June 30 2009 with accuring
interest rate of 11.5%
Current Child Support and medical coverage begin payments of 500.00 a
month until the child emancipates or continues education age to 25
beginning June 15, 2002
He stops paying spousal, but continues to pay current child support
and medical coverage without going to court January 2004
Let's say he's not paid from January 2004 to current date, August 15,
2005. This would be 20 months @500.00 a month arrears he's
accumalated, with interest
Now your wondering how to enforce the court order?
You have two options:
1. Go through the courts to enforce your order with or without an attorney
2. Contact your local Child Support Office and ask them to enforce
the order, do a wage assignment, Freeze his back accounts,
etc.........
If you already have a current child support case, then, you just let
them know that your moving, and to what state. Moving from one state
to another or country is not justification for him to ignore the court
order. Your case just becomes an interstate case and the two states
exchange data through the Federal Case Registry and the state that you
live in is the state that enforces the child support order and then if
there's arrears owed to the previous state, then they can't enforce
those arrears until your receiving current child support without any
arrears being owed to you and the new state you moved too.
I hope this help
Welfare Reform did alot of good for the Child support offices to
enforce child support orders! |
