owner receives outside salary- part of business income. how to post
gross - then net on books, also post tax and 401 deductions?

In the simplest of forms,

Balance Sheet:
Cash - CR (net cash paid to employee)
Employee Withholding Tax Payable - CR (fed, state, local, SDI withheld)
Employer P/R Tax Payable - CR (FICA, SUI, FUTA, Medicare)
401K Payable - CR

P&L:
Salary Exp - DR (Gross wages earned)
Payroll Tax Expense - DR (FICA, SUI, FUTA, Medicare)

Hope this helps. =)