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Q: Resume ( No Answer,   9 Comments )
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Subject: Resume
Category: Computers
Asked by: maggs-ga
List Price: $20.00
Posted: 29 Oct 2005 17:14 PDT
Expires: 28 Nov 2005 16:14 PST
Question ID: 586564
What do you think I can improve on my resume and cover letter? How
should I be present myself? Do you have any suggestions? My employment
goal is a job in the IT industry, educating users, working with
hardware and software to fixing PCs.

I have pursued coursework in

Windows Server 2003 Administration
UNIX Network Administration
CISCO Network Devices Configuration
C++ and Java Programming

EDUCATION: 
 Berkeley College, New York, NY
Bachelor in Business Administration
Major:  Management
Degree Awarded: September 2004
G.P.A:  3.28, Honor?s List
Member of Student Government Association

Coursework completed:
 
?	Entrepreneurship
?	International Business

TECHNICAL
SKILLS:
?	Proficient in the use of Microsoft Windows XP Professional, Word,
Excel, Access, PowerPoint, Outlook, FrontPage, Exchange, and IBM
AS/400, Knowledge of SUSE Linux 9.3
?	Proficient in Adobe Photoshop, Dreamweaver MX, Visual C++ 6,  UNIX
and Windows Server 2003 administration
?	A+ Certified (September 2005)

EXPERIENCE:
June 2000
      to		            Staples The Office Superstore, Inc. Woodside, NY
  Present	            Retail Sales Associate
			
?	Merchandising and offering office equipment products:
?	Performing inventory control and audit analysis
?	Diagnosing and fixing customer PCs 
?	Gathering data and information using IBM?s AS/400 system

April 2004
       to 		            The Mark Hotel, New York, NY
June 2004		Assistant Network Administrator- College Internship

?	Diagnosed equipment failures, and assisted with replacement
?	Responsible for troubleshooting internet connectivity on corporate
and guest network
?	Maintained mission critical server connectivity

January 2004 
       to			Prime Manhattan Realty, LLC. New York, NY
March  2004		College Internship

?	Designed blueprint layout for office space reconstruction
?	Entered Online Real Estate leads into database
?	Prospected for leads using online news articles

REFERENCES FURNISHED UPON REQUEST


To Whom It May Concern:


I am interested in a Desktop Support Engineer position within DOITT. I
possess a technical background with regards to computer, network
maintenance and administration procedures within Windows, UNIX, and
Linux environments. I have studied UNIX Network Administration and
Windows Server 2003 administration as well as Java programming at
LaGuardia Community College. I am studying Network Operations (CISCO
router administration) this semester.  I possess the ability to
effectively diagnose and troubleshoot PC hardware and software issues.
I also possess the ability to fix and maintain Xerox and Ricoh
copiers.

 In addition to my knowledge of computers, my work experience has
given me numerous skills. These skills include inventory management,
store planning and design, loss prevention, conflict resolution
skills, as well as CD prepress and design. I also design and
administer my own web sites, which include my resume site and an
e-commerce site.  My technical knowledge includes proficiency in the
following software packages as well as many others:

?	Microsoft Visual C++ 6
?	Microsoft Windows Server 2003
?	Microsoft Windows XP Professional 
?	Macromedia Dreamweaver MX
?	Microsoft Exchange 
?	Adobe Photoshop 7
?	Red Hat Linux 9 Administration
?	Pitney Bowes Mailing System (UPS)

I am interested in this position because I believe it will provide me
with an opportunity for growth, and also benefit your company. With my
experience and drive, I have set goals for myself which I have
attained. I believe that tasks can not only be done, but can be done
more effectively to maximize the use of resources within your
organization.

Enclosed you will find links to my design projects.
http://www.thomaspmaguire.com
http://www.nicolemhernandez.com
 
 I believe I could be of great service to your organization. Please
contact me at   to arrange an interview at your earliest convenience.
I am best reached between 7 am- 3pm at the above number. Thank your
for your time.
 
Sincerely,

Signed
Answer  
There is no answer at this time.

Comments  
Subject: Re: Resume
From: sanjay_bhardwaj-ga on 31 Oct 2005 01:19 PST
 
Hi Maggs,

Try registering yourself in Job sites, some of them are:

Jobsahead.com
Monster.com
Dice.com
Placement.com

Cheers

Sanjay
Subject: Re: Resume
From: jack_of_few_trades-ga on 31 Oct 2005 05:18 PST
 
In your cover letter, make it as personal to the individual company as
possible.  Look in the job description and qualifications required to
come up with ideas... then relate your own experiences (the more
specific you can be the better) to the description and qualifications.
 Also be sure to address the contact person by name if possible, if
not then be sure to atleast address the HR department and the company
by name.

I worked in HR briefly (in a training program) and noticed that most
of people don't take the time to do this, but those who do get much
more attention from the employer.
Subject: Re: Resume
From: tr1234-ga on 31 Oct 2005 08:31 PST
 
To a certain extent, asking how to tweak a resume is one of those
things where if you ask 10 different people, you're likely to get 10
different answers. So take my comments with a grain of salt, but in
addition to the very good comments already made here, I'd suggest:

1) Move your "Education" and "Technical Skills" part to the bottom of
your resume. Lead with your actual experience. A potential employer's
main concern is going to be if you can do the job; the best way to
show that you can is often to talk about what you've already done in
previous jobs.

2) That said, since it seems your goal is to get a job that's slightly
different from your recent ones, maybe you want to start your resume
with a statement like "Objective" or (perhaps better yet) "Profile" in
which you briefly state who you are, what you want, and--most
importantly--what assets you offer to an employer.

3) The bullet points under each of your previous positions are very
much job descriptions, a list of tasks and assignments you had in
those positions. You should rejigger that section to better reflect
your own achievements in those positions. Did you, personally,
increase revenue for the company, find more customers, sell more
products? Did you, personally, cut costs for the company, save the
company money, make the company more efficient?  Basically, in this
section, ideally you want to not only describe what the position
required, but also how you surpassed those requirements.

Just some off the top of the head thoughts. Take them only for what
they're worth. Good luck!
Subject: Re: Resume
From: traducer-ga on 01 Nov 2005 08:04 PST
 
Hi Maggs.
May I add my tuppence worth (I have hired a lot of Engineers - however
I am UK based and we tend to be more Brit-consservative than other
countries.) Jack & Tri1234 have got it about right, so I wont add,
however for me the covering letter is overly long and juggled, may I
suggest;

1) You start 2 paragraphs with "I am interested" - repetition, start
the first one with "I am looking for".
2) For the 1st two paragraphs cut down the technical content if
possible, mention 'teamwork' & 'project' somewhere - a covering letter
should ideally only take up 1 A4.
3) Move the links to your design projects to underneath your technical
skills list. In the skills list amalgamate the 3 MS Windows skills
into 1 line, i.e. MS Windows Server 2003, MS Exchange, MS Workstation
2000/XP (if you havent worked with 2000 just lie - its a doddle & you
can do it easily with server03 & xp experience - trust me)
4) This now gives you two terminating paragraphs, however they already
seem similar, judge for yourself...
"I am interested in this position because I believe it will provide me
with an opportunity for growth, and also benefit your company"
and
"I believe I could be of great service to your organization."
Also...
For the UK this following comment seems arrogant and could be
misconstrued as a criticism of the existing company systems..
"I believe that tasks can not only be done, but can be done
more effectively to maximize the use of resources within your
organization."
The person that reads this will probably have set up the systems and
thinks they run great. I reiterate - this is a UK point of view
(suggested mods below).
5) I bin any CV that does not include an addendum with a references
list including contact phone numbers - references in UK are done
person 2 person by phone, often prior to interview, my time is
valuable.
6)Contact times are a no no for me. I will phone during the working
day if i dont get you 1st time I will try next morning.. are you only
able to work until 3pm? no good to me. Even if you cant work after 3 -
this can be negotiated once you have your interview - dont hint at it
beforehand.

I would (personally) prefer your final two paragraphs varied along these lines...

I am interested in employment with <insert company name> because it
will provide me with opportunities for experience, personal
development and also be beneficial to yourselves. I am comfortable
working on projects either alone or within a team and am sure that I
would be able to assist you in maximizing the use of resources within
your organiSation. [You Americans with your Zed's & Esses :-)]
 
 I have attached my CV for your perusal, please feel free to contact
any of the referee's on the seperate references sheet. If you think my
skills could be of service, I can be contacted on the above number to
arrange a mutually convenient interview time.
Best Regards or Yours Sincerely.

I hope this appears to 'flow' more smoothly...  if not ignore this comment  :)
Subject: Re: From: traducer-ga on 01 Nov 2005 08:04 PST
From: maggs-ga on 01 Nov 2005 14:32 PST
 
Hey, your information is pretty good. I never really included
reference sheets with my resume, so it seems from your logic they
would be in the rubbish bin by now. I think I'll send reference sheets
from now on.

My cover letter is a freak of nature, it's quite long, and it
definately needs improvement. That is why I am here.

Most of my experience focuses on the retail sector, I take technical
courses at a local college on the side, and I am going for my Master's
in Computer Science in January.

Thanks everyone.

Anymore ideas would be greatly appreciated.
Subject: Re: Resume
From: traducer-ga on 02 Nov 2005 01:33 PST
 
Examples from the University of Kent in the UK.
http://www.kent.ac.uk/careers/cv/cvexamples.htm
Subject: Re: Resume
From: maggs-ga on 02 Nov 2005 05:26 PST
 
EXPERIENCE:
    June 2000 
        to                        Staples The Office Superstore, Inc. Woodside, NY
      Present                   Retail Sales Associate
?	Facilitate sales by offering unique solutions
?	Evaluate inventory controls and develop security policy
?	Assist associates with use of AS/400 systems
?	Diagnose and fix customer PCs

    April 2004 
        to                        The Mark Hotel., New York, NY
     June 2004                   Assistant Network Administrator-
College Internship
?	Diagnosed equipment failures, assisted with replacements
?	Located  IT supplies, completed Purchase orders for supplies
?	Responsible for troubleshooting internet/ application connectivity
on corporate network
?	Assisted Hotel guests with equipment usage and replacement

EDUCATION:
   July 2001		Berkeley College, New York, NY
      to                           Bachelor in Business Administration
 September 2004         Major: Management
                                    Degree Awarded: September 2004
			GPA: 3.28, Honor?s List
			Member of Student Government Association

TECHNICAL
SKILLS		Proficient in the use of  MS Windows Server 2003,  MS
					Workstation 2000/XP, MS Office Suite, IBM AS/400, SUSE 				Linux
9.3, Adobe Photoshop, Dreamweaver MX, Visual C++ 6, 				UNIX Server
administration
			A+ Certified (September 2005)
			CISCO Router/ Switch configuration

		
REFRENCES FURNISHED UPON REQUEST




To Whom It May Concern::

I am looking for a Desktop Support Engineer position within DOITT. 


I am interested in employment with DOITT because it will provide me
with opportunities, personal development and also be beneficial to
yourselves. I am comfortable working on projects either alone or
within a team, I am sure  I would be able to assist you in maximizing
the use of resources within your organization.

I have attached my resume for your perusal, please feel free to
contact any of the referees on the enclosed reference sheet. If you
think my skills could be of service, I can be contacted at (347) 256
6037 to arrange a mutually convenient interview time.

Best Regards,



I left the spacing in the cover letter to fill in details more
relevant to the job. It makes it easier for me to reconfigure my cover
letter, in the event I need to fill in experience and or other skills.
I like the way my resume looks. At least, now I don't have to fight
with it going 2 pages.

Thanks everyone
Subject: Re: Resume
From: mike123456789101112-ga on 02 Nov 2005 10:42 PST
 
Hi there,

Please see below an article we published recently which gives some
good general Resume/Cv information

CV Writing ? Write a Perfect CV

Your CV is a gateway to getting an interview for that ideal job. It is
your opportunity to provide a good first impression but you only have
two sides of A4 paper in which to do it. It is not surprising then
that most people have trouble getting started.
Firstly, you need to know what the employer is thinking. 
The employer suddenly has a vacancy. Filling the vacancy is going to
take up valuable time that he would rather spend doing his normal job.
He would love to find the perfect person immediately rather than
plough through hundreds of CV?s. It is often a dull, thankless task.
The employer has a job description in front of him. It includes
experience or qualifications that are essential for the job and some
attributes that are desirable but not absolutely necessary.
He starts going through the pile of CV?s on his desk. He scans each
one for about 30 seconds and makes a judgement.
He simply hasn?t got time to read the CV that is more than two pages
and all the relevant information is hidden in long paragraphs. - He
files it in the bin.
Fancy formatting, coloured text or multiple fonts do not impress him.
Is this person trying to hide their lack of experience for the job
behind an artistic CV? ? He files it in the bin.
He notices spelling mistakes and poor punctuation. This person is just
sloppy! ? He files the CV in the bin.
He breaths a sigh of relief, the pile on his desk is smaller already.
He makes another coffee and then starts reading?????????.
This should tell you a few things about writing your CV.
Keep it concise and to the point. The employer needs to see your work
experience, skills and achievements in the first 30 seconds of
scanning your CV.
He knows what he is looking for. You have what he is looking for.
Don?t distract him from your relevant skills by adding in lots of
unnecessary information.
Keep it simple. Plain formatting, simply laid out under headings. The
employer wants to see exactly when, where and what you have done.
Fancy formatting makes your CV difficult to read. It may make your CV
stand out from the rest but for the wrong reasons.
Keep checking your english. Good spelling, punctuation and grammar are
essential. It is the first step in your personal presentation to an
employer. It says a lot about you. Also, poor english distracts the
employer from reading the content of your CV.
Now the content:
Contact details should be displayed on the first page. When he decides
to invite you to interview you want him to see immediately how to
contact you before he changes his mind!
Personal details should be limited to those that are absolutely
necessary. Most employers expect to see your nationality and date of
birth but you can choose to leave these out if you think they may go
against you.
Other personal details such as number of dependents, driving license
and marital status can be included if it is not going to make your CV
too long by including them. These can help employers to get a rounded
picture of the person they are going to interview. Do not include
names and ages of children or name of spouse. The employer is not
interested at this stage.
Interests can be included but only in one or two lines. It may provide
a starting point at interview for general conversation before getting
down to serious questions about your work experience. It also gives a
rounded picture of you without taking up too much space on the CV.
Profile is positioned prominently in your CV and should be used to
sell yourself in one paragraph. It is an opportunity to sum up your
skills, experience and general suitability for the job for which you
are applying.
Career History or Work Experience. The heading you use depends on the
length of time you have been in fulltime employment. If you have
recently left school or university you should use the heading ?Work
Experience? and include all placements, paid and unpaid work. If you
have been in fulltime employment for the last two jobs this should be
under the heading of ?Career History?. Do not use both headings in the
CV. Whichever heading you use you must include dates, name and
location of company and a brief description of what your job entailed
including all the positive contributions you made to the company.
Education should be described in terms of selling yourself to the
employer. Include all relevant courses, dates passed and name of
school or college. But, leave out poor grades and failures. These will
not help you get invited for interview.
If you have a university degree you can leave out all of your lower
qualifications. Mature applicants may want to leave out ?Education?
altogether, as your career history and skills are probably more
important.
Skills can be described under three headings: Technical Skills,
Professional Courses and Additional Skills. Technical skills are those
related to a technical, mechanical or engineering job. You need to
list your skills and how recently you have used them e.g. Java
Programming used in the last 3 years. Professional Courses are those
that you have attended specifically for a particular job e.g. sales
courses, hairdressing. Additional skills are anything else that may be
relevant e.g. languages, keyboard skills, health and safety courses.
Finally: Make it easy for him!
Remember, the employer has very little time. He doesn?t know you yet
and is only interested in what you can offer him and his company.
Make it easy for him to:
Scan your CV,
Identify that you have the skills he is looking for.
Pick up the phone to invite you in for an interview.
E & O E - Copyright 2005 CVwriting.net
http://cvwriting.net CV Writing - How to Write a CV - We show you how
to write a CV in minutes. Professional CV writing at a fraction of the
price. Full instructions and helpful tips. Telephone support and Web
CV options for your complete CV writing solution
Subject: Re: Resume
From: traducer-ga on 09 Nov 2005 07:12 PST
 
Hi Maggs,

It looks good to me, stick the original bullet points (which were
good) into the employment experience section and 'jobs a good un'
(Brit colloquialism).

Good Hunting
T

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