Where is the best place to live when I will commute to Rockville and
my spouse will commute to Baltimore?  We are trying to equalize
commuting time for both

I would suggest Frederick, MD it is about a 40 minute drive to
Rockville, and a 45-50 minute drive to baltimore.  It is a small city
with great schools, and is still reasonalbe when it comes to property
value.  Frederick is about as close are you can get and keep the price
of a single family home within a reasonalbe range.  Hope this helps. 
Let me know if you have any more questions.

I would agree, Frederick County.  It is very quiet and peaceful and
safe out there.  Racial diversity is lacking, but it is improving. 
Land value is increasing as the population moves out west, so a home
in frederick will definitely be a wise investment.  It's a straight
shoot down 270 to rockville, and a straight shoot east on 70 to
baltimore.

Here's some interesting info on Frederick,  a great place.

http://www.city-data.com/city/Frederick-Maryland.html