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Q: Witholding ejaculation: ( Answered 5 out of 5 stars,   1 Comment )
Subject: Witholding ejaculation:
Category: Relationships and Society > Romance
Asked by: pbyrnecc-ga
List Price: $2.00
Posted: 26 Apr 2006 21:06 PDT
Expires: 26 May 2006 21:06 PDT
Question ID: 723215
What is the best way to prolong intercourse and avoid ejaculating,
while still proceeding at a good pace?
Subject: Re: Witholding ejaculation:
Answered By: sublime1-ga on 26 Apr 2006 23:50 PDT
Rated:5 out of 5 stars

I'm an experienced tantra practitioner. First of all, it's best
to think of it as expanding into a potentially much more fulfilling
experience, rather than avoiding or resisting a pleasurable one. To
an experienced practitioner, orgasm is low on the list of possible
experiences. Bliss is a very real possibility.

The basic techniques are quite simple, really, but take some 
practice to break old habits:

- Slow your breathing. As your practice improves, you will find
  that it helps to synchronize your breathing with your partner.
  In order for this to be the most effective, it will help to 
  inform your partner that you are experimenting with exploring
  sex in a different way, meant to enhance the experience for
  both of you. Her cooperation will greatly improve the results,
  and it's unlikely she'll find this objectionable in any way.

- Relax your abdominal muscles, and breathe abdominally rather
  than exclusively in the chest (the "full yoga breath" combines
  abdominal and chest breathing, starting with relaxing and filling
  the abdomen, followed by the chest, with the exhale being the 
  reverse. This can be learned and practiced outside of lovemaking.
  Other key muscles include the lower back and the anal muscles.

- Allow your attention to expand beyond the genitals and include
  your entire body. One method that greatly assists this is to
  extend your awareness into your partner by maintaining eye
  contact. This pulls your attention up and away from the genitals
  and out into your partner. In the process your awareness of the
  rest of your body will expand. This practice is ancient, and can
  be seen repeatedly in images and statues from India, where the
  Kama Sutra originated. It's commonly called 'gazing'.

When the abdomen is relaxed, it's easier to extend your sense of
feeling into your partner and the rest of your body, becoming 
more aware of other sensations and intuiting what your partner
is feeling, or might enjoy feeling.

You talk of "maintaining a good pace", but good in what sense?
If you mean good enough to satisfy your partner, I think you 
will find that your increased awareness of her, often facilitated
by slower movement, will have a much greater impact on her than
your speed.

Finally, in "normal" sex, you normally seek the "peak" experience
of orgasm. In prolonged sex, you re-learn how to seek the "valley"
experiences, wherein lies the potential of tangible bliss. These
are moments when arousal is incredibly intense, for both of you,
but the energy becomes transmuted, through relaxation, eye contact
and synchronous deep breathing, into powerfully blissful experiences
which quickly become more desirable than orgasm, which can put a
relatively disappointing end to it all, though even orgasm, after
extended expansion, can be mind-blowing.

An excellent discussion of this topic is available on this article
from the Lucky Mojo website, by Catherine Yronwode, titled, 'Male
Control of Ejaculation':

More on sacred sex from the same site:

pbyrnecc-ga rated this answer:5 out of 5 stars and gave an additional tip of: $2.00

Subject: Re: Witholding ejaculation:
From: weed_4_me-ga on 13 May 2006 00:42 PDT
imagine your grandmother naked.

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