Where is Osama bin Laden?

Anyone who can answer that can earn a lot more than $2 by providing
the information elsewhere. ;-)

The quick answer would be On The Run. Is that a town in Missouri?

The safest bet is that he's currently somewhere in the United States
earning a serious amount of money as an Osama bin Laden impersonator.

The cynical answer is that he's in a New York apartment overlooking
the rubble of the World Trade Center, and he's been there for the last
six years.

The preferable answer, of course, is that he's six feet under.

Funny that, I've just been reading an autobiography of John Simpson, a
BBC reporter who tended to get about.

Around 1992 (could be earlier) he was filming in Afghanistan, when
Osama turned up and asked the (friendly) Mujahedin to kill JS and his
cameraman for $500

The locals declined the offer, and Osama took to his bed, weeping with frustration.

Now, JS could have invented this, but if he did not, it is rather interesting.

My take is that he is a stage prop - if he is alive at all.