Would have been 80 today!

(Well, it's already June 1 here in the UK. When will the rest of the
world catch up?)

Happy Birthday, Marilyn!

My question is ...

Had she lived ...

Who would she have been married to today?

My guess: Prince Charles. 

(Yeah I know he's got an ex and a current but who knows what might have happened.)

Bryan,

Thank you for selecting my remark about Marilyn Monroe and Teddy
Kennedy as answerworthy material. I'll expand a bit on my imagined
history.

After a near-death experience mixing booze and barbiturates, MM swore
off drugs and alcohol, with the assistance of a top-secret Alcoholics
Anonymous chapter which is for celebrities only. At one of the
celebrity AA meetings, Marilyn encountered the newly detoxified Edward
M. Kennedy, whom she had known only slightly up to that point. Since
they had JFK and AA in common, the two had a lot to talk about, and
one thing led to another, and yet another, and eventually Ted dumped
his wife Joan in order to marry Marilyn, who was pregnant with twins.
The Catholic Church wasn't keen on the remarriage aspect of this, so
Ted converted to Judaism (which, as you'll recall, was a faith that
Marilyn had embraced when she was Mrs. Arthur Miller) and the
lovebirds were united in marriage by Reform Rabbi Barry Goldwasser (no
relation to you-know-who).

After Lyndon Johnson decided that he'd had enough of the Presidency
and declined to run, the happily married and greatly envigorated Ted
Kennedy was a lock for the Democratic nomination, and in the
Presidential election of 1968 (with the faithful Hubert Humphrey as
his Vice-Presidential running-mate), Teddy easily beat Richard Nixon,
who retired from politics and became a tournament poker player of some
renown.

Time flew, as time tends to do. Two fabulous terms later, President
Edward M. Kennedy and the gracious First Lady Marilyn M. Kennedy left
the White House, and the couple (with their twin sons, John and
Robert) retired to an expansive and expensive Florida estate,
Mar-E-Lago -- named for MAR-ilyn and E-dward and some lagomorph
(possibly Bugs Bunny). It is rumored that both of the Kennedy twins
are interested in public office. Since one is ultra-conservative and
the other is ultra-liberal, it is entirely possible that they may
eventually run against each other, thereby guaranteeing another
Kennedy in the White House one day.

Best regards from your tabloid correspondent,
Pink

Magnificent!

And totally credible.

I do like the idea of more Kennedys in The White House and I can
visualise Marilyn as the Matriarch.

Why can't real life be as exciting as Make Believe?

All the Best

Bryan

Ahem,

The Prince of Wales, eldest son of The Queen and Prince Philip, Duke
of Edinburgh, was born at Buckingham Palace at 9.14pm on 14th
November, 1948.

Which makes him 57.

Knowing she had a penchant for presidents would Clinton have been a candidate?

Ah, yes.  My German government radio station also recalled MM's birthday today.
My first thought, however, was that I would rather not think about how
she might be at the age of 80, remembering Marlene Dietrich's
self-preservation of her public image by withdrawing from view in old
age.

My bet is that Arthur Miller would have stayed with her  - and she with him.
Authors are longsuffering, understanding people.  Maybe she would have
inspired works appropriate to her age.

Oh dear, Myo, You have got it HOPELESSLY wrong!

And you, you are usually so UNPECKABLE.

Now, I am going to peck away:

First, Arthur and Marilyn divorced in 1961!

Second, Arthur fell off his perch last year!

So, there's no way that they could have remained happily married and
have celebrated her 80th.

Another illusion shattered!

Bryan the Sad

If she had lived, Marilyn Monroe would be married to Teddy Kennedy. In
fact, she'd be his First Lady, since her presence in his life would
have emboldened him to spiff up his Presidential aspirations.

Oh dear ... What a day ... 

Now I find myself in disagreement with my idol, the illustrious Pinkfreud.

I seriously doubt if Marilyn would now be married to Edward Kennedy,
had she lived, because I doubt if she would have survived the
unfortunate accident at
Chappaquiddick in 1969.

Maybe she would have been better able to float due to her superb
buoyancy aids but there is still room for doubt that she would have
survived.

Sorry, Mistress Pink.

PB

Ah, but perhaps the accident would never have happened if Teddy had
been with Marilyn. Instead of gadding about in the nighttime with a
female admirer, Teddy would have remained at home, canoodling with the
missus. And poor Mary Jo Kopechne would have survived, never having
set foot in the Tedmobile.

Come on, Bryan!  If you can play the "What if they were still alive?" card,
so can the rest of us.

Without a doubt, she would have been married to Prince Rainier III (Rainier
Louis Henri Maxence Bertrand Grimaldi).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rainier_III,_Prince_of_Monaco

If they had been married, he would still be alive today.

Hmmmm. Marilyn Monroe, huh? How might she look on the great Mt.
Rushmore as a 5th great? Hmmmmm.

Queen Ha, who's still mulling over a 5th great . . .

Wow yes indeedy, Denco, Why not Prince Deluge?

They were made for each other; Marilyn could have told him about
Niagara. He would have been mightily impressed.

Looking forward!

Double wow yes indeedy, Queen Ha, Marilyn on Mount Rushmore ... What
an exciting thought!

But, surely, she would be top heavy and might easily cause an avalanche?

And think of the climbers that she would attract!

Brian,

I thought about trying to do a Photoshopped version of Marilyn on
Mount Rushmore, but I found that someone has already done this. Some
other well-known faces are up there, as well, and the artist did an
excellent job of it:

http://www.watsonswildlife.com/elvis_presley/Renato_Casaro_Mount_Hollywood_2304_BEJ.htm

Hi Pink

Truly excellent!

Many thanks.

But aren't we making things rather too easy for your friend Queen Ha?

Reacting to pressure from the PF Fan Club, I am now forced to admit
that Teddy K and Marilyn would have made an ideal couple and, had the
Great Lady lived, they would have duly wed and lived happily ever
after.

So, please Pink post this as your Answer but, if you can, tell me also
when they would have occupied the White House.

Many thanks!

Bryan

What might have been!

Of course, she converted to Judaism for Arthur Miller, so a conversion to
Catholicism would not have been a stretch.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe

"When Rainier III of Monaco was looking for a famous wife, Monroe was
suggested. However, since she wasn't Catholic, she could not be considered."

There were connections!
http://www.fashion-planet.com/sept98/features/backto/bloch/home2.html

"As Marilyn Monroe wrote to Grace Kelly on the eve of her wedding to Prince
Rainier, 'Every star deserves their right to sparkle.'"

So close!
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2005/04/07/db0701.xml&sSheet=/portal/2005/04/07/ixportal.html

It was [Aristotle] Onassis who first had the idea that Rainier should improve
the image of Monaco by marrying an American film star. Marilyn Monroe was
informed, and though not interested - she thought Monaco was in Africa - did
not doubt her capabilities. 'Give me two days alone with him,' she said, 'and
of course he'll want to marry me.'"

Looking back!  denco-ga

Many thanks, Denco

Silly Marilyn thinking that Monaco was in Africa ...

I thought everyone knew that it was in China.

Looking sideways!

Bryan

Bryan,

Many, many thanks for the five starlets and the $10 tippage. As a
Marilyn fan from way back, I enjoyed this flight of fancy very much.

~Pink

OUch!  Maybe authors aren't as long-suffering as I thought.

Great question and very great answer.