I'm looking for the source and wording of a quotation I heard long ago
about etiquette. It is something like etiquette (or manners or
politeness) is human affection gone rotten, i.e., laws of politeness
are a poor substitute for fellow-feeling. I'm looking for the name of
the (slightly?) famous person who said this, and the phraseology,
rather than someone to invent a new aphorism.

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Request for Question Clarification by pinkfreud-ga on 24 Jul 2006 11:44 PDT

How about this quote, from the letters of Thomas Jefferson?

"In truth, politeness is artificial good humor, it covers the natural
want of it, and ends by rendering habitual a substitute nearly
equivalent to the real virtue."

http://www.4literature.net/Thomas_Jefferson/Selections_from_Jefferson_s_Correspond/3.html

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Request for Question Clarification by pafalafa-ga on 24 Jul 2006 13:15 PDT

Or, it could be Ambrose Bierce's entry from The Devil's Dictionary,
which defines politeness as "The most acceptable hypocrisy".

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Clarification of Question by pc251-ga on 01 Aug 2006 05:04 PDT

Pinkfreud-ga has found what I was thinking of. Thank you.

I am delighted to learn that the Thomas Jefferson quote I suggested
was the correct one. I've reposted it below.

"In truth, politeness is artificial good humor, it covers the natural
want of it, and ends by rendering habitual a substitute nearly
equivalent to the real virtue."

4literature: Works by Thomas Jefferson
http://www.4literature.net/Thomas_Jefferson/Selections_from_Jefferson_s_Correspond/3.html

I became aware of the quote when I was in college. A friend of mine
had "Politeness Is Artificial Good Humor... Thomas Jefferson" printed
on a sweatshirt. Really good quotes stand the test of time!

Best regards,
pinkfreud

Spot on answer. Very impressive considering my question was quite vague.