I have gathered some plum quotes about love from the inimitable P.G. Wodehouse.
"Some time before, when he had found it impossible for him to be in
her presence, still less to converse with her, without experiencing a
warm, clammy, shooting sensation and a feeling of general weakness
similar to that which follows a well-directed blow at the solar
plexus, he had come to the conclusion that he must be in love."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "The Coming of Bill"
"Dudley Pickering was not a self-starter in the motordrome of love. He
needed cranking. He was that most unpromising of matrimonial material,
a shy man with a cautious disposition. If he overcame his shyness,
caution applied the foot-brake. If he succeeded in forgetting caution,
shyness shut off the gas."
"The consequence was that, in the days that followed the Reigelheimer
episode, what Lord Wetherby would have called the lamp of love burned
rather low in Mr Pickering, as if the acetylene were running out."
"Gloom had settled upon Dudley Pickering and he smoked sadly. All
rather stout automobile manufacturers are sad when there is a full
moon. It makes them feel lonely. It stirs their hearts to thoughts of
love. Marriage loses its terrors for them, and they think wistfully of
hooking some fair woman up the back and buying her hats."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "Uneasy Money"
"Claire was speaking again. She had paused for a while after her
recent speech, in order to think of something else to say; and during
this pause had come to her mind certain excerpts from one of those
admirable articles on love, by Luella Delia Philpotts, which do so
much to boost the reading public of the United States into the higher
planes. She had read it that afternoon in the Sunday paper, and it
came back to her now.
'I may be hypersensitive,' she said, dropping her voice from the
accusatory register to the lower tones of pathos, 'but I have such
high ideals of love. There can be no true love where there is not
perfect trust. Trust is to love what--'
She paused again. She could not remember just what Luella Delia
Philpotts had said trust was to love. It was something extremely neat,
but it had slipped her memory.
'A woman has the right to expect the man she is about to marry to
regard their troth as a sacred obligation that shall keep him as pure
as a young knight who has dedicated himself to the quest of the Holy
Grail. And I find you in a public restaurant, dancing with a creature
with yellow hair, upsetting waiters, and staggering about with pats of
butter all over you'."
"Absence is the acid-test of love that separates the base metal from
the true... But as for love--love is not a machine. It cannot be
shattered and put together again."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "Uneasy Money"
"...he turned abruptly and stalked into his cottage, where he drank
tea and ate bacon and thought chaotic thoughts. And when his appetite
declined to carry him more than half-way through the third rasher, he
understood. He was in love.
These strong, silent men who mean to be head-gardeners before they are
thirty, and eliminate woman from their lives as a dangerous obstacle
to the successful career, pay a heavy penalty when they do fall in
"Why, then, did not Thomas Kitchener give Sally Preston flowers? Well,
you see, unfortunately, it was now late autumn, and there were no
flowers. Nature had temporarily exhausted her floral blessings, and
was jogging along with potatoes and artichokes and things. Love is
like that. It invariably comes just at the wrong time. A few months
before there had been enough roses in Tom Kitchener's garden to win
the hearts of a dozen girls. Now there were only vegetables, 'Twas
"It is singular how diffident a normally self-confident man can
become, once he is in love."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "Something to Worry About"
"The Wise Man stroked his beard.
'My son,' he said, 'the matter is simple. True love takes no account of looks.'
'No?' said Agravaine.
'You two are affinities. Therefore, to you the outward aspect is
nothing. Put it like this. Love is a thingummybob who
'I'm beginning to see,' said Agravaine.
'What I meant was this. Love is a wizard greater than Merlin. He plays
odd tricks with the eyesight.'
'Yes,' said Agravaine.
'Or, put it another way. Love is a sculptor greater than Praxiteles.
He takes an unsightly piece of clay and moulds it into a thing
'I get you,' said Agravaine.
The Wise Man began to warm to his work.
'Or shall we say--'
'I think I must be going,' said Agravaine. 'I promised my wife I would
be back early.'
'We might put it--' began the Wise Man perseveringly.
'I understand,' said Agravaine, hurriedly. 'I quite see now. Good-bye.'
The Wise Man sighed resignedly.
'Good-bye, Sir Knight,' he said. 'Good-bye. Pay at ye desk'."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "Sir Agravaine: A Tale Of King Arthur's Round Table"
"Love's young dream, I muses to myself, how swift it fades when a man
has the nature and disposition of a lop-eared rabbit!"
from P.G. Wodehouse's "By Advice Of Counsel"
"Love might tug and tug again, but never more should the trousers of
passion break away from the tough, masterful braces of self-control."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "Ahead of Schedule"
"In affairs of love the strongest men generally behave with the most
spineless lack of resolution."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "Wilton's Holiday"
"Love (says the Oldest Member) is an emotion which your true golfer
should always treat with suspicion. Do not misunderstand me. I am not
saying that love is a bad thing, only that it is an unknown quantity.
I have known cases where marriage improved a man's game, and other
cases where it seemed to put him right off his stroke. There seems to
be no fixed rule."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "A Woman is Only a Woman"
"He had never seen her before, for she had only arrived at her aunt's
house on the previous day, but he was perfectly certain that life,
even when lived in the midst of gravel soil, main drainage, and
company's own water, was going to be a pretty poor affair if he did
not see her again. Yes, Cuthbert was in love: and it is interesting to
record, as showing the effect of the tender emotion on a man's game,
that twenty minutes after he had met Adeline he did the short eleventh
in one, and as near as a toucher got a three on the four-hundred-yard
from P.G. Wodehouse's "The Clicking of Cuthbert"
"In making love, as in every other branch of life, consistency is the
quality most to be aimed at. To hedge is fatal. A man must choose the
line of action that he judges to be best suited to his temperament,
and hold to it without deviation. If Lochinvar snatches the maiden up
on his saddle-bow, he must continue in that vein. He must not fancy
that, having accomplished the feat, he can resume the episode on lines
of devotional humility. Prehistoric man, who conducted his courtship
with a club, never fell into the error of apologizing when his bride
complained of headache."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "The Intrusion of Jimmy"
"War is war, and love is love, and in each the practical man inclines
to demand from his fellow-workers the punch rather than a lofty soul."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "A Damsel in Distress"
"Marriage, the dynamite of the soul; that was what hit Bobbie. He
married. Have you ever seen a bull-pup chasing a bee? The pup sees the
bee. It looks good to him. But he still doesn't know what's at the end
of it till he gets there. It was like that with Bobbie. He fell in
love, got married--with a sort of whoop, as if it were the greatest
fun in the world--and then began to find out things."
from P.G. Wodehouse's "My Man Jeeves"
"You know, the way love can change a fellow is really frightful to
contemplate. This chappie before me, who spoke in that absolutely
careless way of macaroons and limado, was the man I had seen in
happier days telling the head-waiter at Claridge's exactly how he
wanted the chef to prepare the sole frite au gourmet aux champignons,
and saying he would jolly well sling it back if it wasn't just right.
from P.G. Wodehouse's "Jeeves in the Springtime"
I hope this is helpful! Thanks for a very enjoyable project.