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Q: How do I become a Researcher ( Answered 5 out of 5 stars,   10 Comments )
Subject: How do I become a Researcher
Category: Science
Asked by: probonopublico-ga
List Price: $2.00
Posted: 04 Nov 2006 11:55 PST
Expires: 04 Dec 2006 11:55 PST
Question ID: 780093
No, not an anonymous GA Researcher but a REAL Einstein-like Researcher
where I can get celebrity status with worldwide recognition for my
discoveries plus a few Nobel Prizes and all sorts of honours, possibly
even a Dukedom?
Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
Answered By: pinkfreud-ga on 04 Nov 2006 12:47 PST
Rated:5 out of 5 stars
Mon cher Bryan,

Why, anybody can be a researcher. Research is a very mediocre
commodity. Every pusillanimous creature that crawls on the Earth,
slinks through slimy seas, or runs for political office can be a
researcher. Back where I come from, in the great but oddly-shaped
state of Oklahoma, we have community colleges, seats of great
learning, where folks go to become great researchers. And when they
come out, they research their lives away, and with no more brains than
you have. But they have one thing you haven't got: a hat.

Please note that the hat linked above is a special, magic hat for your
use only. Although others may click the link and view the hat, if they
should attempt to utilize its powers they will be afflicted with
numerous pesky ailments, including - but not limited to - deplumation,
dropsy, and dyscrasy (and that is just the D's).

Best of luck with the Chapeau de Recherche! 

probonopublico-ga rated this answer:5 out of 5 stars and gave an additional tip of: $10.00
Wow, Pink, Very Many Thanks, You really are a Wiz!

I never realised it was so easy.

I have donned my new hat and I already feel empowered.

However, my delight has been tainted by the note of jealousy
introduced by my good friend the Mighty Myo.

Next time I meet him, I shall make jolly sure that my hat is locked
away somewhere safe.

Now, I must get down to some serious research and my first project is
to find a recipe for Lemon Meringue Pie.

I shall be eternally grateful.

A New Man

Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: bowler-ga on 04 Nov 2006 14:04 PST
Interesting paper:

"Becoming and being a researcher: doing research as lifelong learning"

Or just put on Pink's hat!
Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: myoarin-ga on 04 Nov 2006 14:49 PST
Lieber Bryan,
I am sorry to have to tell you that an Okie ejucation won't be enough
to qualify you as a genuwine GAR.  I'm sure the magic hat will help,
but only for a person who believes in the Wizard of Oz.  Another
magical source of knowledge is what you will have to have. 
Unfortunately, it seems to require your having a hole in your head 
(besides those natural ones), but a little trepanning these days is
not very painful and well worth the expense for having all knowledge
and wisdom poured in via the Nuremburg Funnel.  The hat will nicely
cover the wound until it heals.

Good luck, Myo
Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: steph53-ga on 04 Nov 2006 15:02 PST
Oh my.....

I can see this picture so clearly.

Bryan wearing his new hat;)

Of course, he would need to be wearing his matching royal purple cloak!!!

What a site for sore eyes....heheheh.

Amused in Canada
Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: answerfinder-ga on 05 Nov 2006 01:56 PST
Now I know where I have been going wrong. This is the one I've been wearing.
Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: pinkfreud-ga on 05 Nov 2006 11:10 PST

Many thanks for the five stars and the ample tip! I am a bit concerned
that Myoarin might attempt to filch your new hat. To lure him off, I'm
posting a link to a different sort of hat, one that should appeal to a
gentleman who lives in Germany. I designed this several years ago for
my dear friend and colleague Scriptor:

Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: probonopublico-ga on 05 Nov 2006 11:30 PST
Hi Pink

Thanks for the piccy of Scrippy's hat ...

'But has he still got it?' I wonder because ...

I've seen Myo wearing a some such.

Could it be ....?

Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: pinkfreud-ga on 05 Nov 2006 12:06 PST
Not to worry. If Myo already has a similar hat, it is probably one of
those faux chapeaux that you can get on eBay from the sort of
unscrupulous persons who sell Rolexes made of plastic, counterfeit
Gucci bags on which the word "Gucci" is spelled wrong, and gold rings
that turn your finger green.
Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: myoarin-ga on 05 Nov 2006 13:00 PST
If I were a German, I would take umbrage at Pink's demeaning
adaptation of the reknowned Pickelhelm, symbol of vainglorious
Germanic manhood  - but I am not.

What I actually were is this, without the stiffening ring:

or one of three felt hats, including one from the Saiser Alm, another
from James Lock & Co. (which my father borrowed for his last few
years, proud of the maker's name).

It's whats in the head, not on it, that counts.
Uh, ... er, ...  please don't comment on that ....  ;-)

Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: pinkfreud-ga on 07 Nov 2006 13:26 PST
>> If I were a German, I would take umbrage...

Please don't take my umbrage, Myo. I only have one umbrage left, since
the other one was filched from the coatroom during a rainstorm.
Subject: Re: How do I become a Researcher
From: themadjester-ga on 26 Nov 2006 01:56 PST
To your origional question:
Most people who go into research study at a University or another
institution such as a college, however name is not important as long
as the institution has a good  academic reputation.

As for what degree (or more?) you could get, many people go for a
degree in Science or Engineering (Although Engineering often leans
more towards the applications of reseach and knowledge). If you wanted
to go all the way Einstein calabre you could get a degree and then do
a PhD (particle physics perhaps?)

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