I am often a little late for appointments. After many iterations I've
settled on "Thank you for waiting for me." as my little
acknowledgement of my tardiness. I now rarely say "Sorry for being
late."

I prefer #1 because it is positive. Its draw attention to and
acknowledges the kind act of the other person's waiting for me.

I dislike #2 because it is negative. It draws attention to my lateness
(which may have not been noticed) and it makes a further request of
the other, pardon.

Am I on the right track here?

As far as manners goes, it is considered rude to keep people waiting
on you, thus it is proper to acknowledge your rudeness with apology. 
By saying "thank you for waiting for me" you are not acknowledging
your own behaviour, and making it seem as though it is not neccessity
but kindness on the part of those who wait on you...they may well be
annoyed, and further annoyed that you don't acknowledge the gaff. 
That they waited does not negate the need for apology -- you can both
apologize as well as thank them for indulging your rudeness.

I understand that you would like to be perceived positively and not
negatively, but by being late _often_, you signify that you are
chronically not respectful of other people's time, nor a person that
can honor their own word to meet at a pre-determined time.  This
speaks badly of you, and soon no amount of apologies or thanks for
waiting will ameliorate the annoyance of others at this chronic
behaviour.  The repeated behaviour makes _anything_ you say lose
sincerity, since you don't seem to correct for taking advantage of
their time and misrepresenting when you will arrive.  When one is late
often, it signifies a general disregard for others and makes your word
worthless.

Seems to me that you are seeking to find a good way to spin bad
behaviour, rather than actually earn the positive regard legitimately.
 Why not simply get there on time?

YES, I'm late but only .... (hours/minutes).

This is certainly not the record and, from the very bottom of my
heart, I apologise ...

For my pilot who landed at the wrong airfield, for my chauffeur who
drove like an old woman and for my wife who proved proved once again
that she's no navigator.

Well now I've got that off my chest, I must say that I was surprised
to see that you got here ahead of me.

No, no ... There's no need for you to apologise. Really.

I generally agree with what scavengernyc-ga has said.

You are on the right track in that focusing on your lateness does
accentuate the negative, and thanking the person for waiting implies
that you appreciate their patience. It also draws the focus to them
and what a patient person they are.

However, some people will find it rude if there is no apology. You can
compromise by apologising and then thanking them for waiting for you.
Then at least the last thing spoken has some kind of positive
connotations.

Us Brits are well known for always saying sorry and apologising over
at the slightest thing ? even when it?s not our fault or it?s not
necessary to - so I think I would find a "Thank you for waiting for
me", without an apology, rather annoying, and if it was a business
meeting, a very bad starting point.
I would expect an apology such as "Sorry I?m late, I hope that I have
not kept waiting too long. There was a traffic jam on the motorway".
Personally, I abhor bad time keeping but I know there are times when
one cannot avoid it.
answerfinder-ga

If it is your fault than you should appologise and say sorry to
other.It is greatness of any one if he admit his fault without
pointing by others.So saying
"sorry to keep you waiting"are good words.

augusta-ga: Here's a useful ploy, but it can only be used once per
victim:(You) I'm a bit early, glad to see you are here too. (Victim)
No, you are 30 minutes late. (YOU) What? (look at watch) I have (fill
in appropriate time).
monroe22

If I am late, and I say "Thank you for waiting for me," this deflects
attention from my transgression. I think it's better to face up to the
fact that I've messed up by giving a brief, sincere apology.

my favorite:

"I'm SO sorry, (insert excuse here), thank you SO much for your patience"

Augusta,

I like your approach, yet it may need adjustments depending on your
audience. The confidence of "thanks for waiting" with no excuse,
indicates that you were attending other equally or more important
matters. If the meeting started without you, then no one was waiting
for you anyway, which negates your thanks.

If suitable turn up on time but a day late, unless it's a Friday, or
unless you really want to be at the meeting. I know someone who used
this ploy when running late for a job interview. The appointment time
was made over the phone, so no written proof. He got the job.

Carry some bandages in your car. Wrap your hand roughly, walk in to
the meeting and say "Don't ask!". Traces of blood go down well.

After you get out of your car, rub your hands on one of the tyres and
graze the knuckles of one hand. Walk in and say "Can I quickly wash my
hands?"

Slash your briefcase, take the cheap one.

If you wear a watch set it forward by seven minutes. Do not calculate.

Apologise if you need to, but above all offer no excuse. Excuses lead
to questions unspoken. No excuse keeps them guessing.

Phil

I'd briskly walk in, flop my briefcase down on the table, and in a
very concerned voice exclaim:

"Holy Cow! Did anyone see what's happening on the news!"

Then I'd immediately sit down and get right to the meeting. That way
they'll just have to privately wonder how relevent my tardiness was -
but the beauty of it is that no matter how hard they look AFTER the
meeting they'd never find out.

tutuzdad-ga

To apologize and remain positive about what the other person has done
(wait), is the right thing.  You're on the right track.  I imagine
that you weren't trying to deflect the apology but avoid the trite,
overused, meaningless, 'Sorry I'm late.'

Try:

I'm sorry for being late.  Thank you for waiting.

or

Thank you so much for waiting.  I'm sorry for being late.

I gather a lot of these answers are tongue in cheek, but I find it
purely amazing how much effort is put into simply avoiding personal
responsibility, and instead great energy is put into creating lies and
continuing in rude behaviour.  When somone is so late that they've
started developing a gameplan for excuses, it's, IMHO, time to take
stock of yourself.  It's as if it never occurs to anyone to simply
work to get to places when they say they will and honor their word.

Strange...

Changing chronic, recurring, undesired behaviours is not a simple
matter. The causes are often multiple and deeply rooted. People with
these kind of negative habits know that the behaviour is problematic
and often want to change but meet deep resistance within themselves
when making the attempt.

see:
http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview?id=440200
http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview?id=439237
http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview?id=431749

Though I continue to work on it, I have yet been able to succesfully
untie the gordian knot of my recurrent tardiness. However, I find that
I have much control over what I say on arriving late for an
appointment.

Augusta - very true, very true.  I'm heartened by the fact that you
are then aware of this and are trying to approach from that
perspective it as you simultaneously manage it with the stop-gap
measures of ... well - spin! ;-D

BTW, I dig your co-opting of the "-ga" extension on usernames to
effect an actual city/state location, LOL.

I was rarely late for school, thanks to my Ma & Pa who made sure that
I set off in good time, but one day they overslept and I was late.

Unfortunately, the Headmaster decided to make examples of the
latecomers that day and some ten or so of us were told to report to
his study.

He stood us in line and he went along the line questioning each of us
in turn why we were late.

Without exception, each pupil said that they had overslept and without
exception they all got 'the strap'.

I was at the end of the line and when the Headmaster asked me why I
was late, I told him that my parents had got me up in good time and
they had sent me off to school in good time but I had played on the
way to school, and this had made me late.

The Headmaster looked pleased and announced that I was the one boy who
had told the truth and that I would not be punished.

I thought that was rather good actually.

You may use this, if it helps.

Boss (angrily): Augusta, you are late AGAIN!

Augusta (crawling): Yes ... But please give me credit for being
consistent. Don't you just hate those people who are never late and
then, when they are, you worry in case something terrible has happened
to them?

Fixing tardiness is easy.  Simply aim to be early.  It's not a novel
concept.  Just subtract 15 or 30 minutes (or more) from your deadline
arrival time, as needed, and you will rarely be late.  The rest are
pure self indulgent excuses.

If you are constantly late it is because you are arrogant and you
simply do not care about your fellow human beings. You are telling
people ?my time is more important then yours?. You don't need words,
you've allready said it all.

Isn't it arrogant to accuse another person of being arrogant with so
little knowledge of that supposedly arrogant person? How arrogant of
you!