This album had a mock gameshow running through it.  I can remember two
of the many questions:

1. "How many feathers has a purdue chicken?"
2. Something like "What does "touche et lellet pou" mean?"

The first part of my question is:  what exactly was the second
question (and is it in French or ___), and what was the answer to the
question?

(Extra points if you can also answer question 1.  But please don't
just guess "3 -- is the magic number", which is the recurring theme of
the album...)

The second part of my question is:  was there actually a way to enter
the gameshow and, if so, did anyone win?  I can't find my album
anymore and, as I recall, the liner notes were no help.

-Literally Minded

---

Clarification of Question by dunno-ga on 25 Jul 2002 03:39 PDT

lisarea - thanks, that is amazing!!!  (and especially for a freebie!) 
you can relax now, it won't hurt a bit.

after much hand-wringing i have come to the tentative conclusion -
hypothesis? - regarding our puzzler:

     "touch and be able" [lisarea] + 
     ""Les poux" (pronounced "lay poo") means "lice" in French." 
[pinkfreud]
     = 
     a veiled warning about catching crabs during certain voluntary
activities.  scary, huh?

if you check the de la authorities cited so far, that kind of makes
sense given that one of the songs on the album talks about getting the
clap, which is also probably pretty unpleasant...  although probably
still preferable to what happens at the Purdue factory.

are you with me?

unfortunately i don't have enough confidence in this view to pay
myself the $3.33 yet.

---

Request for Question Clarification by lisarea-ga on 25 Jul 2002 12:13 PDT

Hi, Dunno!

I very much like your cautionary tale explanation, but in the
interests of gathering all the facts, another researcher, bethc,
pointed out this possible interpretation:

toucher léger peau 
[tooshay layzhay poo] 

which means "to touch light skin."

Another factor to keep in mind is that the 'game show host,' Al Watts,
uses a sort of purposefully cheesy Broadcaster English 'accent,' for
lack of a better term, and he may consequently be mispronouncing some
of the words. With this in mind, the first 'et' may be a suffix of
'touche.'

To break it down so far:

1. Toosh is almost definitely 'touche,' meaning 'touch.' 

2. 'Et le le' is just crazy talk. The literal definition as
transcribed is 'and the the.'

3. So far, there are three possible explanations for the 'poo' sound:

pu - been able
poux - lice
peau - skin

'Touch' and 'skin' seem to go together nicely, and touching skin is a
recurring theme throughout the album as well, but the lice explanation
would also fit, as I believe you are right about the STD theme as
well. They're mentioned or alluded to in Jenifa Taught Me, Buddy, and
at least one other song on the album. (Interesting sidenote: de la
Soul and Kurt Weill had similar proclivities for the name 'Jenny.' See
Knickerbocker Holiday and the Threepenny Opera for examples from
Weill.) However, 3 Feet High and Rising provides a valuable public
service in that it appears to . One factor that makes me lean toward
the 'peau,' or 'skin' interpretation, is that lice are never
specifically brought up. As evidenced by Can U Keep a Secret and A
Little Bit of Soap, they do not shy away from discussing hygiene
issues, and the STDs referred to throughout the album are usually
referred to in context the prevention of such via prophylactics, and
prophylactics don't prevent scabies.

Also--oh, how do I say this delicately--throughout this album, the
term "Buddy" is used to refer to a portion of the male anatomy, which
can tend to be a shade or so lighter than the rest of the body. Again,
not a solution, but possibly an angle from which to begin to approach
a solution. Such is science.

One more thing: I would like to retract my statement about the chicken
in the liner notes cartoon. It is a DUCK. It looks nothing like a
chicken at all. I don't know what I was thinking. Just wanted to clear
that up before some snooty hip hop scholar takes this opportunity to
taunt me.

Obviously, I didn't do a very good job of not thinking about this. 

Tread Water,
Lisa.

According to this webpage (searched on -"de la soul" 3 feet-):

http://www.seditionists.org/HFh/reviews/007.cu4.html

...these are the questions:

"How many feathers are on a Purdue chicken? How many fibers are
intertwined in a shredded-wheat biscuit? What does
touche-et-eh-lay-pooh mean? How many times did the Batmobile catch a
flat?"

Here's a link to more complete lyrics:
http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/SongUnid/EB34498AADB822A4482568B70002DB9F

Now, for the answers.

How many feathers are on a Purdue chicken?
The liner notes have a little comic strip in them, with a chicken who
appears to have no feathers, but is sweating profusely. I can't
guarantee this is a Purdue chicken, but that's all I've got. My guess
is that a Purdue chicken is dead and plucked and packaged, so the
answer could be none.
(search terms involved looking for the bright pink spine among my CDs)

How many fibers are intertwined on a shredded wheat biscuit?
It depends on how you define 'intertwined.' Looking at one, the fibers
are wrapped around, but not actually woven together or anything. So,
the answer is either 'none' or 'lots.'

What does 'touche et lele pu' mean?
According to http://babelfish.altavista.com, the French to English
translation is "Touch and lele been able." You'll probably have to go
from there, maybe finding an alternate spelling for 'lele.'
Unfortunately, the lyrics aren't in the liner notes, so the spelling
isn't for definitive. It could be 'touche (the word that sounds like
'et' in English)et le pu," which means "Touch (whatever that 'et' word
means) and been able." This last one is my guess, but I'm stumped with
the second word. It could also be some kind of inflection of 'touche,'
but I give up now, and think someone who knows French should go from
here.

How many times did the Batmobile catch a flat?
Oh, good grief. I have no idea.

Dunno, now I've got a brainworm! I've somehow been able to suppress
these questions in my mind until you brought them up.

I listened to the questions a couple of times, and phonetically, it's
something like "Toosh et lay lay poo," so I tried a couple more
spellings.

One that seems like it might be on the right track is "touche et le
let pu," I get this from Babelfish (link in previous comment):

touch and the which been able let 

"touche et le le pu" gets me "touch and be able," but that doesn't
make any sense. It looks like the two 'the's cancelled each other out.
Hmmm.

I really do give up. I swear. 

No, really. I swear I'm not going to spend all day trying to figure
this out.

Really.

"Les poux" (pronounced "lay poo") means "lice" in French. 

Dunno about the rest of these questions. My brainmobile caught a flat.

I had promised myself that I would stop thinking about this. Obviously
I cannot be trusted to keep my promises. ;-)

lisarea-ga, your "toucher léger peau" is certainly inventive, but
there are two problems: I believe that the French adjective "léger"
refers not to lightness of color, but lightness of size, weight, or
importance (as in "light aircraft" or "light reading." And "peau" is
not pronounced "pooh" (as in Winnie The...) but more like "poe" (as in
Edgar Allan...)

I can't help wondering if this fellow has something to do with the
mysterious phrase in question:

http://www.celebritypads.com/gc32-Pepe%20Le%20Pew%20(new).jpg

~pinkfreud-ga

Heck, this question has got me so befuddled that I can't even post a
link correctly.

I shall try again:

http://www.celebritypads.com/gc32-Pepe%20Le%20Pew%20(new).jpg

I don't understand my linkage disaster above, but this one should
work. I shall re-post my attempt at humor, as well. And then I shall
go thwack myself with a rubber Purdue chicken.

Final answer: 

I can't help wondering if this fellow has something to do with the
mysterious phrase in question:
 
http://makeashorterlink.com/?H12422D51